A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Sorry to sound so dumb, but how do I know if it's just a crush I'm having or if I've fallen out of love with my husband of 11 years and in love with someone else at work?
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reader, anonymous, writes (7 October 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks, everyone, for your thoughts and advice...I wonder though about the possibility that there is more than one love a person can experience in a lifetime.. As one grows up and changes, values change, partners may drift apart and someone else appears on the horizon who is a true soulmate for you at that stage in your life... If everyone always avoids temptation and tries to recreate old feelings of love to their current partner (whom they married when they were younger, different), is this really the way to true happiness?
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 October 2008): It's a crush. If you have to ask you cannot love this man - it's the excitement of liking someone new. Try and remember how you felt when you first met your husband and try and recreate those feelings.
Good luck.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 October 2008): Dear Poster
Be cautious; it seems as if you are confused and have emotional turmoil; I URGE you please be careful; don't make any hasty decisions. I suggest you get counseling to help you to clear your mind.
There must be lots of factors that have contributed to you having doubts about your feelings for your husband and as for your feelings for the other guy; vow, be careful it might just be infatuation; maybe you were lacking some attention and he is fulfilling that need.
You have posted very little information and I don't want to start speculating; BUT please be careful, don't do something that you might regret later.
If your marriage is important to you, do something to save it; depending on the circumstances, it is possible to reignite those loving feelings for your spouse.
Don't allow the excitement of a "crush" or fling to ruin your marriage.
Best wishes and lots of SMILES.
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A
male
reader, IRDave +, writes (6 October 2008):
 EVERYBODY gets crushes now and then, it's human nature. The reason you may feel like you want to stray could be because things at home are making you look further afield.
Has anything changed in the relationship with your husband?
It's very hard to definitively say "Yes, it is just a crush" or "No, you want to leave your husband".
The one thing I will say is before you act on it please, PLEASE think about what you have at the moment. If you have any love for your husband you would at least give him the courtesy of a definite "I am leaving you" before you act on your crush.
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A
female
reader, lovely lilly +, writes (6 October 2008):
you dont. the only way you can finde out is by taking the gamble is it really worth losing the man you know you love?
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