A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:Hi, I'm 14 in May and i really really like this guy in my school but he's 18 in August so there's four years between us, plus he's leaving school soon. I asked him out once and he said he would - IF i was his age. We're really good friends already so should i pursue him or just forget about him once he's left? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, karen1989 +, writes (17 July 2010):
 Age gaps work in relationships if both parties are at a mature age. Your 14 still going through puberty, he is a young adult. If you were 20 and he was 26 it wouldnt be as bad because your both adults.
Funnily enough the first person i fell for was when i was 14 he was 17, but i was always quite mature for my age. we were friends but there was always some kind of a spark between us-we both noticed, we talked about a relationship but he was always concerened about my age even though i was as mature as he was it was still morally wrong. So we went our seperate ways, we couldnt be friends because we both felt something extra for eachother,and we couldnt be together because of the age gap. the only thing left to do was to leave eachother alone which we did. It was hard but i moved on.
Good luck :)
Karen.
A
male
reader, C. Grant  +, writes (26 March 2010):
 If you were my daughter I'd do everything possible to keep you from him. It's one in 10,000 of these relationships that doesn't end in tears.
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A
female
reader, Love_is_all_youu_need +, writes (26 March 2010):
 Hunni, at the age of 14... an 18 year old is definately too old for you! He is an adult and you are a still a child. I'm 18 and I wouldn't dream of dating a 14 year old, it just isn't right!
My boyfriend is 24, so there's a 6 year age gap between us. But none of my family disapprove because we are both mature adults. Perhaps a few years down the line, it might work out for you and him. But chances are you'll move on from this guy and find someone else!
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (25 March 2010):
To be honest, yes. And he has told you so too. I think it's best to move on for your own well being and for his.
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A
female
reader, celtic_tiger +, writes (25 March 2010):
 Short answer, he is WAY too old for you.
He has already told you what he thinks, that you are too young for him, so you need to respect his feelings and get over him. No matter how much you pursue him, he isnt going to change his mind, and as an 18 year old Adult Male, he would really be commiting a crime by dating you. He is being totally honest and respectful. By saying what he did, he was letting you down gently, and I take my hat off to him for that. He could have broken your heart by being totally honest and saying no. But he didnt do that. Be glad.
If he is 18, then he will be going to University, or going into full time work. He will be meeting and socialising with Women (not young girls) his own age, and doing adult things. He would not want to date, or hang about with a 13 year old girl, who couldnt even go and see a 15 rated film at the cinema. He will be out, drinking, dating, and having a great time. He is about to start the next phase of his life, being a grown up, doing grown up things and beginning to start his own way in the world.
How would he date you? What would his friends say? At 13, you cannot give him an adult relationship. Try and think about this from an objective point of view.
I know you really like him, and we all have crushes on older boys when we are young, but you need to realise that this is never going to happen.
You would be better off forgetting about this guy now, moving on and finding a boy your own age to hang out with. BUT, boys are not the be all and end all of life. At 13, you do not need a boyfriend. Concentrate on your friends and school. Boys will come along whem you are a bit older and a bit more mature.
You are still very very young, you have plenty of time in the future to be chasing guys. Dont waste your childhood.
Enjoy being able to do what you want, when you want, because when you hit 18, suddenly life will change, bills, jobs, and responsibility will come knocking.
Take Care.
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