A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I went out with my ex last year for two months. I didn't know why he broke up with me at the time, as he just stopped contacting me without any explanation. We bumped into a few times after that last year, and asked how each other was. I have a new boyfriend now, who i have been with for seven months. My ex knows i have a boyfriend now. When he first found out that i had a new boyfriend, he called me out of the blue and asked how i was and asked if i love my boyfriend. He sent me a text message a few weeks ago too asking how i was, and i replied saying i was ok and asked how he was, but he didn't reply to it. I saw my ex again last Sunday. We were both walking into the same bar and he waved to me. We bought our drinks at the same time, and he asked how i was again. He went and stood with some friends and i went over to him to speak to him, but then he walked away and spoke to some other people that he knew. I was stood there for a while, as i thought he might come back over ( i felt stupid at the time ). One of his friends shouted " Hey, you're really ignorant, you know. She came over to talk to you ", and then he said he would come back over in a minute, but he didn't. A bit later, he went outside to smoke and when he came back into the bar, he smiled at me, but he didn't speak to me. I went over to him later on ( i know, i probably shouldn't have ), and he said i could go to some other bars with him, so we went there. We were talking to each other for the rest of the night. I ended up telling him that i still like him, even though i have a boyfriend, and i told him that i had heard that he still talks about me all the time to his friend ( his friend told me that, and my ex told me that he does still do that ). He asked me to go back to his place, so i did. When we got there, he told me that he ended it with me last year because i was " hard work ", because i wouldn't have sex with him !. I told him that two months isn't a long time to me though, and we were still only getting to know each other then, and i said if we had been seeing each other longer, i would have had sex with him. I was quite hurt when he told me that though. He kept trying to put his hands down my pants too , and when i said no, he told me to shut up, and he said " i bet you like it really ". He also said that we should have got back together sooner. I stayed there all night, and the next morning, he made a couple of cups of tea for me. He asked what i was doing later that day, and i said i wasn't sure. He asked if i wanted to go into town again with him to some bars. I agreed. We chatted for a while in one of the bars, and then he said " Would you be annoyed if i left you and went to another bar to meet my friend ? ", and i said i didn't mind if he went on his own or whether i went too. A bit later on, we were stood talking to a woman that he knew, and i went to the ladies room. When i got back from the ladies room, he had gone out of the bar and i didn't know where he was. I saw him in the next bar i went in. He told me that he thought we should just be friends and he said " i don't know what to say to you because you are courting ( which means seeing someone ). He told me he was going to another bar, and he told me to meet him in there a bit later when i had finished my drink. I wasn't sure if he was trying to get away from me or not at the time, as he told me to meet him in the next bar, but when i got there he ignored me again!. I feel like i have made a fool of myself, but if he didn't want to speak to me any more, why couldn't he just be straight with me and tell me ?.I don't know how i will act if i see him again. I guess i should just ignore him. Do you think he hates me, or do you think he is hurt because i have a boyfriend ?.
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female
reader, Bulka +, writes (9 August 2012):
He is hurt and is hard to forgive . He is comfused if you want him back you may do but what about your new boyfriend? If you get back to to your old do you think he will be able to forgive you. Beacause if not then just stuck to your new boyfriend.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 August 2012): I really honestly don't think he's into you. I think he is playing games and perhaps sees you as 'unfinished' business because he didn't get to sleep with you. I'm quite certain that if things did progress with you two that he would just sleep with you and them move onto the next one. If he really wanted to see you again he wouldn't leave you alone in a bar! He's made it quite plain by saying that he thinks you should just be friends. Guys will often say things they think girls want to hear rather that just outright hurt you by telling you the truth. Try to make things work with your boyfriend, or find someone else other tab this guy. I read a couple of books recently: the rules and another called he's just not that into you. Both are really good for decoding how men act in relationships and how you should be to find mister right. This guy is definitely not the one. A man who's into you will never leave you feeling stupid!!
HTH
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A
female
reader, fishy fish  +, writes (9 August 2012):
Hello, I don't think he hates you to be honest , It's just that he's not that into you to start with. The man broke up with you because you were hard work? Really? I wish you laughed at him when he said that! The guy is a complete mess! I think the only reason he is doing that is the fact that his ego is shattered into pieces when he knew you moved on so quickly! He probably thinks he's God gift on earth. Forget about him please, he's a mess, he surely wants to prove to himself that he can still get you even I you have a boyfriend and it explains why he invited u over. The minute u spent the night over and told him u liked him still he acted all disrespectful and bad. Forget about him, you have a man in your life. If you ever see him Again just be civilized. Nothing more.
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