A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Is my boyfriend gay? He recently told me he would like to try oral sex with a man, then asked me if I would like to watch. I agreed to it and he has been cruising personal ads nonstop for the right person. Then he told me yesterday he would like it to be an occasional thing and have this person as a friend someone to "hang out" with, he even said he would like him to spend the nite once in a while with my BF sleeping between us. So is he only with me because he doesn't want to come out of the closet completely? He seems turned on during sex but mostly into oral and anal. What is really going on here?
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female
reader, 48years  +, writes (16 December 2008):
 Wow! He may be bi-curious, he may be hoping you'll watch and copy what he's doing, or he may be setting you up so that he can invite another woman...hard to say for sure.
Do you watch porn movies together? Does he select gay ones? Can you be as open about asking him outright if he is gay as you'd like him to be open with admitting it?
What's his relationship history like? That'll give you a clue. And, if you do agree to his request, you can always back out...or at least insist on safe sex procedures.
A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (16 December 2008):
 I'm not sure what is going on, but I understand your distress. Your boyfriend is suggesting awful things, and it's easy to think he wants you as cover.
I think you should not agree to his having sex with another man. And also I think you need to have a serious conversation about how each one of you sees the relationship.
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