A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I got an email from a guy I have been seeing briefly saying that bad things have happened to him lately with his job and other things. He didnt go into detail.I have only seen him 3 times (the last time we had sex), we both are in other relationships but had great fun. He said he wanted to see me again. Then I rang him 4 days ago and he said he didnt know when he could see me again due to work.Today he emailed apologising for being quiet on the phone but said that bad things have happened to him with work etc. He said that now he couldnt concentrate sufficiently on our relationship, but he wanted to. He asked how I was and said bye for now.I am confused. Why did he email me, why not just ignore me? Why say that he wanted to concentrate on the relationship but couldnt? Why put bye for now, does that suggest he expects to see me again?I really like him and want to see him again. I emailed back saying I was sorry he didnt want to see me, that I had had fun and hoped he was ok. I asked him what the problem was. He seemed like a player and so I am confused if this is the kind of thing that players do. Surely ignoring me would be more in line with being a player that letting me down gently by email?? This is why I am not sure if he really is in trouble but wants to see me, just cant right now or if he is just saying that to be kind. What do you think?
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reader, anonymous, writes (9 September 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionAfter I emailed him saying I was sorry he didn't want to see me again etc, I got a reply the next day. He said that it wasnt me, but that he had some things he had to sort out right now. He added that we would meet but he needs time to get himself sorted with a few problems. He put that he would get back to me and said again don't worry the problem is not you. Do I believe him? Is he trying to let me down gently? Or should I not worry? Basically I gave him an opportunity to end it with what I put in my email but he clearly felt the need to tell me ge would get back to me. What do u think?
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reader, anonymous, writes (7 September 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYou don't think he just said that to be nice, let me down gently? What kind of response does he want from ne now? I emailed back saying sorry that he didn't want to see me again, that I had fun and would be there if he needed help with his problems.
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reader, anonymous, writes (7 September 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionSo do you agree that by putting I can't concentrate enough on it but i want to it means he still likes me?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 September 2009): That's what we girls do, analyze, analyze. The important thing is his actions. If he wants to see you he'll call you
and he'll be sure he'll see you.
I wouldn't contact him anymore, wait and see what happens.
in a mean time try to forget it ever happened.
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reader, anonymous, writes (7 September 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks I understand that but am wondering why he said he wants to concentrate on our relationship. He said I can't concentrate on it enough but I want to. Also why say bye for now, why not say sorry take care. Maybe he does have issues?
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female
reader, CupidGirl826  +, writes (7 September 2009):
I read your post...It seems after you guys had sex, he dropped contact with you. You called - he made an excuse. He probably contacted you back because maybe he felt a little obligated...And he wanted to express that things won't be going further or seeing you again.Maybe so he won't expect another phone call - like he wanted to have some closure on the situation.Good Luck
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