A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: okay so this is a very random curious question. I'm turning 30 and have been with 6 men sexually. Is this a lot for a woman of my age to have been with that many men? Sometimes i wonder and feel bad about my sexual experiences. Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, olderthandirt +, writes (3 June 2010):
When I met my wife at the age of 18, she'd already been with8 or 10 guys(yeah she told me). So, @ only 6 you're a rank amature.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 June 2010): If a few men have really huge numbers, then those extras could only have come from one place. They are at the expense of all the other men's totals. That's the only way the math works.
Here is another wrinkle. I think the small portion of loose male sluts probably has more partners than the small portion of loose female sluts. And guess what that means? It means the remaining "average" man has FEWER partners than the remaining "average" woman does!
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (31 May 2010):
You're right, Lazy Guy. Guys can lie, that's for sure.
I saw the guy's spreadsheet and saw him chase everything that moved. No, I wasn't one of them. LOL :P
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A
female
reader, chigirl +, writes (31 May 2010):
Oh my.. I've been with at least 15 and Im 24. So if there should be shame on you I must be burnt alive shouldn't I...?
6 is quite few. You have lived the life of a puritan.
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A
female
reader, raiders +, writes (31 May 2010):
6 by the age of 30 is not big number and should not be a big deal..........
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A
male
reader, baddogbj +, writes (31 May 2010):
Ah, first time I read this I assumed that you meant 6 men at the same time and I was going to suggest that you be more careful but 6 at different times by the time that you're 30, no, really not a lot.
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A
male
reader, LazyGuy +, writes (31 May 2010):
Don't know, is it?
This is about personal choices. YOU were with 6 men and feel bad about it. But it was your choice.
What some women like YouWish don't get is that men can lie about stuff. (Oops, sorry shouldn't have said that, now women will know men can lie to them)
Why is it that you feel bad about it? And if you feel bad about it, what are you going to do about it? Don't let others tell you you should feel bad or good about it. It is your life and nobody elses. Live it as you want to live it.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 May 2010): My boyfriend 26 has been with five women and I think 6 at 30 is good number! for men and women.
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A
female
reader, Ich_liebe_dich +, writes (31 May 2010):
I dont think that you should feel bad about it.personally i never had that, maybe because im too old fashion. But having 6 man till this age, i dont think its a big sin or a problem.
Its ok. as long you are fine and doing fine nothing is to worry about. theres more out there who has more than you are. just enjoy the life and someday you will find the true one.
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A
male
reader, Vagn +, writes (31 May 2010):
it is not a lot at all i know people that are on a lot more than what you are on and so long as your ok and free from any diseases you should be ok.
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A
male
reader, Honest Answer +, writes (31 May 2010):
It isn't an alarming number. Six in a week would bother me, but at 30, six seems about right.
Good Luck!
Jeff
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 May 2010): Haha noo. That's not a lot at all!
Depending on where you live I suppose there are different standards. At age 30 I would consider somewhere between 20-60 to be fairly standard amount of men to have slept with.. Naturally this will vary depending on any longer relationships you may have had during that time
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 May 2010): Well I'm 21 and I've already slept with 6 guys. I dont think it's a lot at all. But as DoubleM stated "everyone has their own moral compass.
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A
female
reader, Gabrielle Stoker +, writes (31 May 2010):
Depends, doesn't it? Do YOU think it's too much? If you had been with these 6 people for the right (and the definition of 'right' is entirely up to you) reasons, I don't see why you should feel anything wrong with it. Maybe it IS 'a lot'. The point is, that's not in itself a bad thing unless you make it so. I'm younger than you and I've been with more people...is it a lot? Probably. Is that wrong? Not according to me.
It's a question DC is not the place to get an answer to - it's an answer only you can give yourself.
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A
male
reader, Kama +, writes (31 May 2010):
Hell no. I'm about your age, and I always think I didn't have enough sexual partners. I'm just one bloke, but I bet many people would tell you the same thing. Some people put you and I to SHAME for numbers - I wouldn't at all feel bad; feel good instead!
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A
male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (31 May 2010):
Your question: "Is this (six men, sexually) a lot for a woman of my age (30)?"
Not in my opinion. Everyone has their own moral compass, as typically shaped by parents, siblings, friends, upbringing, perhaps religious influence and an array of other things. Your question simply depends upon your personal values, but for one older man's reference (for what it's worth to you), It's nothing that you should worry about. Why not?
1. First of all, you cannot change what has happened.
2. If you enjoyed it, then why lament or regret?
3. One way or another, you learn from it (which may
pertain to erroneous decisions for reference).
4. And above all, forgive yourself for anything that
does not physically or otherwise hurt anyone.
PS - I was much more active about your age, but that was around 40 years past and another era . . . .
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (31 May 2010):
Nah, 6 isn't a lot at all! Ask the men on here how many women they've been with by the time they were 30. I heard of one guy who claimed to have been with over 100 women and had a spreadsheet to prove it. I'm assuming you're disease free, so no problem! Our past is our past.
It's not like you had sex with the entire Dallas Cowboys football team or the entire employee roster at Barnes & Noble during your college job. Don't sweat it!
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