A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Can a man go without sex for FOUR months?Let's say he is away from his wife or girlfriend for FOUR months. Can he abstain or will he be weak and succumb to his little head? Any action is better than no action? Just wandering, are men are capable of controlling themselves? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 June 2021): Yes, a man is capable of abstaining from sex for four months.
I haven't have sex in over 3 years.
My wife of 30 years is a cancer survivor and they nuked her sexual desire to oblivion.
I'm loyal and faithful and will stay by her side.
It's difficult to go without sex for so long.
But it's doable.
Of course, being older makes things easier.
If the man is young, I would say it'll be extremely difficult for him.
Ultimately it all depends on his upbringing and his moral values.
A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious  +, writes (25 April 2021):
 Most men are completely capable of controlling themselves if they so wish. Whether YOUR man wishes to do so (because this is quite obviously what this is about) is a different question. You obviously don't feel he IS, otherwise you would not be writing. (I'm pretty sure you wrote a while ago as I distinctly recall the "any action is better than no action" turn of phrase.)
Bottom line: do you trust him? If so, leave him be and trust he will do what is right. If not (which I suspect), then what are you doing with him? Is this how you want to live the rest of your life?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 April 2021): BTW
Astronauts are up in space away from their spouses and significant others for longer than four months. That alone should have answered your sexist question. You know better, your post was meant to be an insult towards men. Work on your bitterness. Male-bashing is just as ugly as misogyny.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 April 2021): Of course we can! After the death of my partner, I was abstinent or celibate for nearly two years. I had normal urges and still felt lustful at times, but I just didn't act on it. I just wasn't ready to be intimate.
When in the military, soldiers can be deployed to remote places, they can be on the battlefield, or in a submarine for months. If they're around only other men, where are they getting sex? If they are living like a hermit, or have taken vows of celibacy; that's going without sex by choice.
I don't know where women get this idea that men are uncontrollable sex-addicts. Lets counter your sexist implication with a another one. Can women stop feeling victimized by all men, just because they've had one lousy boyfriend or a terrible husband???
Men can go as long without sex as we want to. Can women go forever without sex? If circumstances require it, or if you choose to; either gender can live without sex indefinitely. Testosterone and sex-drive will diminish with age, certain medical conditions cause impotence, and sometimes some guys just choose to live single and celibate. Just because they want to.
The question you really have is if the man in your life can? Then you should ask him.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 April 2021): Men and women can go without sex for long periods of time if necessary.
I think though that if a man is in a relationship and is a selfish cheater who only thinks about himself, he will not abstain. It is not a matter of not being able to. Anyone is be able to abstain. But selfish cheaters choose NOT TO.
So, if they choose to abstain, they can. If they choose not to, they won't.
It has been my experience if a man with poor impulse control and a greedy mindset cannot abstain from being an asshole at home, they are not suddenly going to change when they are away from their partners. In fact, I would say the likelihood of them cheating is far greater when they do not have any sex at all like they do at home.
And oh, that vagina will mean nothing. He is going to forget all about her once he comes home to you.
WHAT A PRIZE!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 April 2021): Depends on the individual and age, some can, some can't or won't. At 23 my boyfriend, now husband and I worked in NY and Philly. We'd only hooked-up on weekends. Years later we both admitted to having local FWB (more than one) - I had habit of never really breaking up with exes. I was worse than him, but wanting women have an advantage there. "ya, come on over." to a trusted FWB does it.. Neither of us could be mad with the unfaithful other. We all know people who get divorced over one fling. We equal out.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 April 2021): It's dependent on so many factors. The environment he is in for four months, his feelings towards his wife/girlfriend, his sexual drive, his past history on if he is known to cheat in relationships and his views on monogamy, some men in their heads can think they love their wife/partner so label sex with them as making love but can have sex with other women and justify it as just sex with no feelings.
But no men can almost certainly go without sex for four months, no one NEEDS to have sex to survive
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A
male
reader, kenny +, writes (24 April 2021):
 I think this all boils down to the type of person a everyone is different.
Its about is the relationship healthy, is his love for the person he is with 100%.
If the relationship is without problems and there are no trust issues then i don't see why a man can't go without sex for a long period of time.
It's all about self control, and self control is something we all have within us.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 April 2021): To be honest it depends on the environment he is in during those 4 months. If he is on an expedition with a group of only men to the South Pole or the Saharan Desert then yes he can remain celibate not only for 4 months but even for 4 years. But if he is on a trip to let us say to Newyork or Buenos Aires or any major European or Far Eastern Capital then yes there is a big possibility to er probably in one week.
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A
male
reader, Dragonslayer  +, writes (24 April 2021):
Depends on the person all men are different! Yes, a man can go 4 months with sex! I have gone 9 months without sex and I have also gone 2 years without sex. Ultimately depends on the person. Me personally, i believe in monogamy and I take my sexual health very serious! If you are asking that question most likely you either 1. Have experienced infidelity before and are insecure or 2. You dont trust the person you are currently with. That being said you are in a very unhealthy places or in a very unhealthy relationship. Everyone has a past, but you cant hold another man accountable for the mistake of your past boyfriend! You will ultimately sabotage that relationship! Also trust isnt given, it is earned. So, you have to give him the chance to show you he can be trustworthy
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (23 April 2021):
 What do you think would happen if he didn't have sex? Would his dick fall off?
Of course, a man can abstain for 4 months or longer. A little self-control is something we are ALL capable of. Men, no less than women.
Sure they might be horny, but they have hands and can sort out that problem until they are back with their spouse/partner. It's not rocket science.
Any man who tells you he can't abstain for 4 months is a liar and has failed in self-control.
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