A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:hi every1, would u say 5 months is too early to propose? my girl moved over here from scotland last year, we met through work and got it together end of feb. i know for sure she's the one. i'm going to scotland with her in 2 weeks to meet her family and we are going to a posh hotel she used to go to quite often for a few days. she talks about how romantic it is and thats where she'd love to have her fairy tale wedding one day. she's my princess so i want her to have that dream come true, so i thought well now that she lives here she might think about getting married here, so what if i ask her to marry me when we go there?? i'm just worried that her parents might not like the idea, and i'd like to seek her dads permission before asking her. what if they think it's too quick or they don't like the idea because this is the 1st time they have met me in person? i joked to one of her rellies who lives here and she said her dad would have something to say about it, but her sister told me that when her parents see us together he will see how in love we are.. what u guys think??
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female
reader, sweet_lover101  +, writes (16 August 2012):
 Congratulations and I hope you have many years of Happiness!
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (14 August 2009): we did it! we're now engaged!! a long engagement - but we are so happy!! and so are all the family!
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A
female
reader, k_c100 +, writes (23 July 2009):
 Well in my opinion yes 5 months is too soon, you dont really have any idea about each other just yet and you are still in that "honeymoon" period where everything seems wonderful. I have found in my past relationships is that you dont really know a person until you move in with them, and live together for a while. Then you will see that person's true colours - if all goes well whilst living together then great, thats the time to get married. But on the other hand you might see a totally different side to her and you may not like it!But that is just my opinion, as all the other posters have said this is entirely up to you and if you both feel you are ready to take this huge step.I always wonder why people want to rush to get married, it almost seems like they are thinking "right I have found you now so I must put a ring on your finger to tie you down and make sure you cant go anywhere". What is the rush? How would it be any different getting married this year or in 3-4 years time? Surely if you love each other that much then that love wont fade, and you will still be just as happy in 3-4 years time as you are now?Rushed decisions are never the best decisions, and so many marriages that are rushed into end in divorce because in reality, they never knew enough about each other in the first place. With the guy that I moved in with, we moved in together after 6 months because we were "so in love" and "it felt right". A year later, we had split up and if you asked me why, I would tell you that it was because we moved in together to fast while we were still in that "honeymoon" period. If we had waited a while then I dont think we would have ever made it to moving in together, we would have found out sooner or later that we just were not right for each other.Now I'm not saying that you guys are not right for each other, I'm sure that you will have a long and happy life together. I just think it is wise to wait until that honeymoon period has ended, when the real relationship starts, to see if things are still working and you still feel the same way. And one other concern I have - this hotel sounds like it is a hotel she has stayed at with her ex-boyfriend/s. IF she goes on about how romantic it is, then it is not just somewhere she will have stayed with her family, who goes to a romantic hotel with their family?! So do you really want your proposal to be at the same place she has stayed with other boyfriends?It will seem a little odd to her parents if you ask for their permission to marry her on the first occasion you have met them, they will want to get to know you and hope that you would want to get to know them first. If you go over there and straight away ask for her hand in marriage, then they will think that your only intention was just to ask that question instead of visiting them to get to know them. It will almost be like you couldnt care less about them as people, all you care about is taking their daughter away from them!This is obviously your decision and if it feels right then there is not a lot anyone on her can say that will make you think differently! But my question to you is "whats the rush?" Why do you need to propose now, why will it be any different now than it would be in a year or two's time?Waiting a while would be the sensible thing to do, and would be more appropriate to wait in the eyes of her family too. But I guess love isnt sensible, so maybe this will all fall on deaf ears if you have already made your mind up!I hope this helps and good luck with whatever decision you make!
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A
male
reader, Red Green 0289  +, writes (23 July 2009):
I agree, only you can know how long is long enough. if you know it in your heart, I'd suggest some casual conversations about marriage or long term plans... see what she thinks. Hopefully she'll open up for you.If you love her, I'd say talk to Dad... having the wedding in the old country should be a HUGE hit with Mom! Unless she wants to see some of the finer parts of your wonderful country!
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