A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So, I'm 17 and got to second base with my boyfriend whom I've been seeing for 3 months. I can't say I didn't like it but it made me a bit uncomfortable. Is 17 really an age to going so fast? I would like to take it slower.. but I need to know if there could be any dire consequences if I let it go the way it's going.PS: We've talked about it.. and we definitely won't be having sex though.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 March 2011): Um, hello. I'm the person who asked the question here.Thank you very much for taking time to reply. It really helped a lot. Yes, I think I was scared it would lead to something I'm not prepared for; that made me want to back out. So, I guess for now we'll be taking things slowly for now.Thanks again!
A
male
reader, Dr Vendetta  +, writes (3 March 2011):
 meh its fine. 17? theres grandparents your age.all apart of growing up. if you're cool with it. then theres no problem.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 March 2011): it sounds to me that you know what your limits are and that you feel that it is too young for you (and I would agree 17 is too young).
It seems that you want to keep on track and have a straight guideline, so here it is: "We definately won't be having sex though" Your body probably has other ideas about this so you need to slow down and make sure you know when and were you are going to be spending time with your boyfriend. At 17 your mind is not ready to cope with the after affects if you do have sex. (This is scientifically proven).
And your life would be very difficult if you had a child, condoms and birth control do fail.
Try and find ways to curb your racing hormones. Like exersize sports and good distractions can help!
Yo
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A
female
reader, JDinCali +, writes (2 March 2011):
 Generally, the bases go:
1st - Kissing/Making Out
2nd - Feeling each other up
3rd - Oral activities
Home - Actual sex.
The problem with too much making out and groping is... you are playing with fire! Its so easy to get carried away and lost in the moment, because "second base" is actually called foreplay.
Foreplay arouses hormones and passion to the point rational thinking goes out the window. In other words, you're preparing your body to have sex.
So, if you've both discussed NOT to have sex, then you need to go back to 1st base. The best decision!
Don't compromise your values and what you believe is right. Don't put yourself in danger by too much foreplay.
*No matter what he says; your body will be making the baby.
So limit 1st base wisely.
Take Care and be safe.
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A
male
reader, Mark_25_ +, writes (2 March 2011):
 At 17, the only thing that matters is whether you feel comfortable with what you're doing. You sound like your not comfortable with the situation, therefore you need to talk to your boyfriend and tell him you don't want to be going so quickly. If he's a decent guy, he'll completely understand and won't pressure you into doing anything you don't feel ready for. If he does start pressuring you then he's really not someone worth sticking around with.
Hope that helps you :)
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 March 2011): What is right, is what feels right for you. Do what feels appropriate, and do not go farther. Remember, probably half the girls your age have had sex already, so 2nd base is actually pretty conservative, BUT that said, do not go farther until you really want it, and simultaneously, do not feel you are pushing it to have gone to 2nd base.
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