A
female
age
30-35,
*ubyrose
writes:i met this guy off an online dating website (im 21, he 22).. im quite shy and am rather intimidated by him for various reasons, but we;ve been on a few dates anyways.. just wondering whether guys would persue a girl that they're not physically attracted to?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (17 November 2010): Sometimes guys will pursue girls that they are not physically attracted to, for a number of reasons. Some guys are insecure or have low self esteem, other guys feel they just want to get laid, no matter what. Its unlikely that your guy fits this description if he has been on 6 dates with you, more likely he likes you. There are two ways to find out if he is into you. First, if you know you are into him and have gotten to know him well enough that you want something to happen, then make some kind of attemt to engage in, um, some form of courtship behaviour. For example, kiss him! If he is not into you, you will know. If you need to build up enough courage or or self belief or self esteem or whatever in case you get rejected, then do that first. The second way is to straight up ask him whatever it is you want to know. That also takes courage, and you have to be familiar enough with one another to have challenging conversations, but being able to have difficult conversations is one of the foundations of a good relationships, no harm in starting at the beginning. Or you can just wait and see how it unfolds or until he tells you, but you might not find your answer, so I would encourage you to be true to yourself!Good luck!
A
female
reader, Gabrielle Stoker  +, writes (17 November 2010):
 Very important. I don't think a guy would do 6 dates unless he was attracted to you. Unless of course you've dropped any hints that you are incredibly wealthy or something.
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A
male
reader, rivi +, writes (17 November 2010):
He wants to get into your pants.
You want to get into his.
What's not to like ?
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A
male
reader, Odds +, writes (17 November 2010):
 Your follow-up must have posted while I was writing; that info would have been helpful.
If he's been on six dates with you, he finds you attractive. Life is good.
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A
male
reader, Odds +, writes (17 November 2010):
Yes, with qualifications.
First off, his tolerance for games and nonsense is directly proportional to your hotness. So playing hard to get, being rude, flaking, flirting with other guys in front of him - he will *not* put up with that unless you're way hotter than any girl he's been with before. Confidence is one thing, unwarranted self-importance is a turnoff.
Second, unattractive is one thing, fat is another. Unless he's one of th eminority who is into that, it's just not going to work.
Third - your personality is your best asset here, use it. Be sweet, honest, feminine, and patient. Don't complain about your looks, don't expect him to be perfect. Learn to have a good conversation, if you don't already know. Above all, display loyalty - let him know that if he chooses you, you'll stick by him.
It's like a job application, the hardest part is getting the interview. Your resume = your looks, and if you don't have much to work with, you have to be persistent until you can actually talk to someone.
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A
female
reader, rubyrose +, writes (17 November 2010):
rubyrose is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni dont know. i just am intimidated by him, and think that he probably goes for better looking/more confident girls etc... i mean we've been out on 6 dates, and its not like we're moving fast phsycially (i want to go slow, im a virgin etc and am very cautious) so i dont know if he would give up by now if he was just after sex? or if he would have pursued me for this time if he wasnt attracted to me phsycially (or do guys also place the same emphasis on personality as girls do?)
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A
male
reader, brokenjets +, writes (17 November 2010):
 YES!! get him emotionally attracted learn how to play hard to get and he ll tell his buddy's how "shes not that hot, but i just gotta smash her cuz she thinks she is"
Most guys are scummy and will screw a snake if he could hold it still.If you look anything like the girl in the photos that you have online he is attracted to you. We know this because you have met him in person- im not meeting any uggies in person that i found online. It sounds like you dont think he is "physically attracted to" you. If he agreed to met you he is attracted to you.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 November 2010): No, unless we were just after an easy lay.
What makes you think he's not physically attracted to you?
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