A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Maybe this isn't the best place to post this but people here often give good advice.for a long time in my life (even when i was a really young) i've been terrified of going to new places and meeting new people. it may sound silly but the idea of talking to a stranger is possibly one of the scariest things i could do.to begin with i used to just get really nervous then calm down when im talking to them (same goes for new places) however as i get older the level of fear i feel when this occurs i a lot higher than it used to be and its really starting to be a problem.im at the age where i want to get a job but i cant im just to scared to meet the people. im also going to be attending university soon and im getting worried that i wont be able to function and ill just shut down.its also causing me relation ship problems (the problem being i don't have one) i really want to be able to go get a girlfriend but once again the problem is in meeting new people.really what i'm looking for is either a solution that will magically make me normal or reassurance that i'll eventually be able to function properly.(also please note i'm not exaggerating i am literally terrified and have i effectively only talk to my close friends.)
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male
reader, seneca +, writes (27 June 2010):
You are in the UK, so you can go to any doctor, explain your problem and he can recomend a counsellor on the NHS. It won't cost you and it can really help.
I was very shy too, when I was young, but fortunately as a Catholic I had a sympathetic parish priest (they are not all predators!) who counselled me and helped me overcome my shyness. Now I am sometimes criticised for being too extravert!
A
female
reader, Tisha-1  +, writes (27 June 2010):
 I have a website I'd like you to try out. It's basically a way to assess your thoughts and see if they can be changed to help you move through the world more easily, confidently and with better balance.http://moodgym.anu.edu.au/welcomeI've only just started it and would like to hear if it is helpful to other people. It's based on cognitive behavioral therapy, designed to help people with anxiety or depression. Worth a try, to my mind!Best wishes.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (27 June 2010):
 I don't know but it sounds like you are just shy to me, and at your age it's very common. There is no magical solution. It's a matter of jumping in and get your feet wet. What terrifys you is the unknown, once it's known the fear disappears. Start slowly, join a club at school or an athletic team and build from there. It will get easier as you go along. Take deep breaths and go for it. The world is your oyster, go get it.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 June 2010): Hmm, sounds like you have some kind of social phobia... I think seeing a psychologist would be a good idea, there's no shame in getting some help :)
Good luck!
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A
male
reader, C. Grant  +, writes (27 June 2010):
 This sounds like Agoraphobia. Google it and see if you agree. It's relatively common, and treatable. And you're right to be concerned, because it can be very debilitating, and can seriously interfere with your life. Find some qualified help and you can cope.
Good luck.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 June 2010): Okay,I had the same problem.The best thing to do is to make sure you feel good about yourself inside and out. When your feeling like your on top of the world then people are like ants to you. Take a month and walk around and say to yourself in the *beep*. People are more scared then you then you are of then. You have the balls. And to go to new places try to tell yourself this is just a place way should i be scared? Have to just do what you do and think of yourself good luck !
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