A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:A few weeks ago I helped my girlfriend clean and put the dishes away. Afterwards she filled the sink with dishsoap and undressed me. She wanted me to sit on the counter over the edge of the sink. I was reluctant at first but I did it. She then used the suds to give me the best handjob ever. Afterwards even though it was great i was embarrassed because I thought it was weird and never heard of something like that before. But now I think I want her to do it again and think about it every time she is in the kitchen . I am worried that if I ask her she will not want to after the first time we did it and I told her I would never try that again.
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male
reader, BrownWolf  +, writes (20 September 2017):
You do realise you did not ask her in the first place right??
If I were you...I would be looking for a way fix her clock in the same way. :)
A
male
reader, Roboaxe +, writes (20 September 2017):
 It seems like you two are really close, just talk to her about it, be honest.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (19 September 2017):
 OP if you can't talk to your partner about SEX and SEXUAL acts... then don't HAVE sex. Or you get the sex you get...
Do you want a good sex life? Be willing to be open and honest about what you like and what you don't. Don't lie. It's like women who fake orgasms.. IT DOESN'T help. Because the guy will think she REALLY enjoyed it and he rocked her socks off when he really didn't.
So TELL her you enjoyed it and would like a variation of it again (minus the dish suds) Or initiate something yourself. Invite her to shower with you perhaps? You have all the "right" kind of soaps in there. And a nice soaping of each other might get both or either of your imaginations going.
Do reciprocate her spontaneous act. Make SURE she knows that you REALLY enjoyed it and would LOVE to do more of that kind of things.
She isn't going to like you any less if you admit you enjoyed what she did.
Lying on the other hand? Not helpful.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 September 2017): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI am not disputing the affects of it and appreciate the advice not to use. I did not have any side affects from it and will not allow her to use it again. Thanks
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 September 2017): The advice about skin-irritation and adverse-effects of dish-washing-detergent is supported by medical evidence.
Detergents are not safe for use on your genitals. Substitute with a gentle body-wash. That's intended for all areas of the body.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 September 2017): I'm with wise owl, take initiative to keep it spontaneous and interesting. Dish soap might not be good to use but there's other stuff you could find to do similar stuff with. If my guy was into something I would want to know
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 September 2017): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionOk then. Thanks for the lesson in chemicals and exposure. And I am not sure where my butt came into play with this but anyhow. I thought this was a advice column and not a judgmental one that you could be accused of making false statements.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (19 September 2017):
 Sigh..... aloe, or any other emollient / gliceryne like ingredient will be the inactive chemical ingredient , added for texture , scent, viscosity etc-
it will NOT alter the composition of triclosan, an antibacterial chlorofenol that has been approved , in a concentration of up to 2% in household goods ( and much less in cosmetics ) , only in the way and for the specific use to which each product was destined.
Im short : no, same as you should not drink dish soap, you should not use it as an eyewash , nor you should rinse your genitalia with it .
Which I assumed was common knowledge for any reasonable adult , and plain common sense.
Btw, overexposure to triclosan ( as , for people working in manifacturing it ) has been linked to skin cancer, and while surely washing ONCE your butt with dish detergent wouldn't do you any harm ,more than the unpleasant sensation that you °say° you did not feel....
even assuming that yours is a bona fide question ( ... which, sorry, I do not assume )- then the answer would be simple :
Don't do it. Don't ask her.
Tell her that some chemicals and genitals are not good bedfellows at all.
If it's bubbles which float your boat - there are tons of personal hygiene products which make all the safe, mild, skin friendly foam that one wants !
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 September 2017): Your gf seems spontaneous and creative, you enjoyed it, and partners who love each other enjoy doing things to make their partner feel good- even if it's a bit imaginative!
It's not weird or sordid, it's normal and positive- not like she's asking you to do anything dark.
Don't feel guilty- just return the favour like wise Owl said.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 September 2017): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI am sorry that you think I am a troll , have buffalo skin, or posted this to get a reaction or to brag. I am not an expert on dish soap or its use but I know she only uses a certain one that contains aloe or something like that. She does have fair sensitive skin and washes dishes daily without gloves and has no issues. I was embarrassed to ask this question even on a anonymous page but I asked because after it happened I felt bad. I believe my girlfriend was trying to do something different and I told her I never wanted to do it again. But I was kinda ashamed to say I liked it and wanted her to try it again. I was asking for opionions or advice if anyone thought this was weird or perverted to like something like that. I have never heard of anything like this and was seeing if anyone else ever experienced this. I didn't expect to be bashed for asking this. As for the other gentlemen yes I try to keep things interesting for her as well. Thanks.
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A
female
reader, Anonymous 123 +, writes (19 September 2017):
 I had the same thought as Aunt Cindy
This is a troll who's just describing a sexual act to try and titillate and get a reaction. I don't even understand the point of the question other than to "brag" about getting a handjob with detergent!
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A
female
reader, CindyCares +, writes (19 September 2017):
This must be a troll. Or else a gentleman with the skin of a buffalo.
All dish detetgents contain up of 2% of triclosan, ( the active agent which kills bacteria ). Triclosan is not toxic ( unless you ingest it ,of course ) but it is definitely a skin irritant and would burn like hell when in touch with delicate sensitive skin like your private parts or anus. That's why people do not shower with dishsoap even if it would cost less than using drugstore bought shower gel or soapcakes.
Hands are different, the skin on our hands is more resilient, having been exposed since birth to all weathers , all temperatures and a lot of wear and tear. But even so, I do not know anybody who does not use plastic gloves to wash dishes unless they want to find themselves in a few months with the rough, chafed hands with the hands of a Dickens' era washerwoman.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 September 2017): It was something cool and spontaneous. Why don't you come-up with something to surprise her with. Don't spoil the fun by making things predictable. That was the point of it all.
Now it's your turn to come-up with something for her.
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