A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes: So I am 17 and I like a teacher that is about 26 (I think.) I think he is really cute and just wonderful. However, I do not think that I fell in love with him because of his exterior beauty but because he has a beautiful personality. In a sophomore year I was selected to go to a trip to Africa for about a week and a half. He was the male chaperon of this trip. In this trip he was always looking out for me and making sure that I was okay. He always wanted to be close to me and I kind of started liking him more. Now I am a junior and he is my honors bio teacher. My bestfriend has also noticed how he favors me. And I do not mean as a teachers pet. He likes to get close to me (sometimes a little to close). This past week we went skating and I did not know so he was trying to teach me and he was holding my hand. Oh and I need to say he has a girlfriend since highschool. I know this is wrong but I need help. Others boys have asked me to date them but I only think about him. Help me! Be nice!
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reader, anonymous, writes (12 March 2013): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks! I think I am really going to reconsider this situation
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (12 March 2013):
Help you and be nice are mutually exclusive in this case.
YOU have a mad crush. It's very common and normal.
He's your teacher and he's ten years older and he has a girlfriend. If she was a wife would you still think you had a shot? You don't have a shot now. Not if he's a good, honest, moral ethical man. And if he's not why would you want to be with him?
if he has told you about his girlfriend it's his way of putting distance there.
I can tell you I had a crush on my teacher in 11th grade. I still remember it. that was 1977 btw. I never stopped having a crush on him and he was a first year teacher.
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A
female
reader, k_c100 +, writes (12 March 2013):
You know that nothing can happen between you because he would get into a lot of trouble (he would lose his job, go to prison, have a criminal record for life, never work again, lose his friends and family....his life would be over basically). I'm sure you dont want to ruin his life, so this is where you need to be really mature and take a step back and keep away from him.
I know that will be hard because you like him, but it is for the best. Only see him in class, make sure that on any other occasion outside of class you do your best to stay away from him. Dont speak to him, dont do any activities outside of school where he will be there....basically do everything you can to stay away from him apart from in class. The more distance you have between him and you, the more your feelings for him will fade.
Most teenagers go through a crush on a teacher so what you are feeling is perfectly normal, but you just need to be very careful otherwise you could ruin this man's life so make sure you dont do anything inappropriate that could jeapordise his position as a teacher.
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A
female
reader, llifton +, writes (12 March 2013):
hi there.
i think sometimes it's easy for young teachers fresh out of college, who teach high school, to cross over the lines of what's acceptable when they are teaching juniors and seniors who are almost their age. i mean, he's a young guy and you're a young girl, so this is where it all starts getting cloudy.
your teacher needs to be very careful about this situation. it seems he clearly has an attraction to you of some kind, but he certainly can't act on it. he could get in big trouble for it if he does. he could lose his job and his reputation. afterall, this is his career at stake. you have nothing to lose here, as you're just the student. so you hope for and encourage his behavior. but he's got a lot riding on his decisions. so i think if you care about him like you really seem to, perhaps you should do him a favor and put a little space in between you two. it may not be easy, but it needs to be done. you don't want him getting in trouble, do you? continuing to flirt with him is only encouraging him to do something that will really effect his life in a negative way.
you should try to put this guy out of your head. he's got a girlfriend and he's your teacher. in a year or two, you'll be out of school and it won't matter what you do. try to hit him up then and see what happens. but i suspect by that time, you'll probably have moved on to someone else.
anyway, i wish you the best. and i hope that this situation resolves itself in the best way possible. good luck.
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A
female
reader, Faithful000lol +, writes (12 March 2013):
You're 16 or 17 years old, as a teenager your heart is very young and pure, your feeling for someone is still very flexible. Your teacher is 26 years old, still a very young man and might not be aware of the boundaries between teachers and students. A necessary question: Are you two friends on Facebook/My Space? Don't be friends on personal pages, unless it's not personal and just for students contact only for homework/assignments without his personal info, pictures, family, friends...Getting feelings for someone for his/her good qualities, admiration... is a nice thing. But it should be with wisdom also.
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