A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I am losing my mind.I am taking care of my two small children by myself as a single mother and on top of that I am also taking care of my Dad's kids. My brother and sisters. They are driving me absolutely crazy.They have no parental supervision up at their house, my dad is always at his girlfriend. My 19 year old sister has the mental capablility of maybe a fifteen year old and so she doesn't really know what she's doing. She dropped out of school, doesn't have a job and can't hold one for more than a few days, she has an illegal boyfriend who lives in Mexico who she plans to move up here, illegally.My 16 year old sister is rebelling. She has an attitude all of the time, being a bitch in general. She has dropped out of the main highschool and is now going to alternative, on the bright side she has been on the honor roll ever since the switch.My 12 year old sister is really into talking to boys. She already has been in a lot of fights and also has an attitude. She never does anything but be on her phone. My 10 year old brother is still wetting the bed (bladder problem) and I took him to see a specialist, he refuses to take the medicine or do the exercises unless I am here to make him and I can't be here all of the time. He doesn't clean his room or do any of the chores. Any time I ask him to do something he walks away or goes and hides in the bathroom.They are all lazy, disrespectful, lack parental authority, consequences or any type of structure. The house is completely disgusting, I even go up there three times a week to clean it, but they go right behind me and destroy it. I am at a complete loss of what to do. I have tried to involve social services, they will not get involved. My mother is dead. My grandmother is on the verge of dying and just throws money at them. She doesn't know the extent of how bad it is, she is close to dying and I don't want to worry her. I have no other family out here. My older sister is an addict and is dealing with that kind of life style. All of my dad's family is back East and even they "tolerate" this kind of behavior.My dad is an alcoholic. As soon as he is off work and even sometimes at work he is drinking. After he comes home, he showers, drinks and then goes to his girlfriends house where he drinks and drinks with her until they both pass out and then both get up for work in the morning.I know this is long and involved, I am desparate and crying as I'm typing. I don't know what to do anymore. Please help me.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 May 2013): Thank you very much for the advice, my two children are always first and aren't neglected in anyway. My dad's girlfriend drinks as much as he does and doesn't like children.
My dad works for my grandparents, my late mother's parents, and they have tried to pressure him. He just tells them to f off and mind their own business.
I have watched Gracie's choice and I love that movie, very inspirational. I am trying the best I can and plan to stick it out.
A
female
reader, Mariab  +, writes (27 May 2013):
 This is a lot to deal with for anyone. So let me just take my hat off to you for managing so far! If I were you, I would make my priority the raising of my 2 children. As a single mom your children will need all your attention. You want to make sure you are raising children who will not have the problems your siblings are having due to neglect.
If Social Services doesn't get involved to help you... I think my next option would be to go to my dads job and talk to his supervisor or Manager and ask them to put pressure on him. Perhaps with some humiliation, he may begin to see how serious this is. Also, his girlfriend? Can she not lean on him to take his responsibilities seriously? Its very hard to point you in the right direction. But wherever you are... I really wish you good luck. xxx
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2013):
You need to contact Al-Anon Family Groups for families of problem drinkers and find a meeting close to you.
http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/home
Best wishes.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2013): You can't do anything about the 19 and 16 year olds...even the 12 year old is questionable at this point. You can however take in the 10 year old and raise him in a stable environment. Your first priority is raising your own kids in a happy, secure and safe environment. Rather then spreading yourself too thin- help the siblings that can actually be reached and reformed.
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