A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I'm Asian and my boyfriend (in his mid 30s) is American, I have a few questions here regarding endearment in English as I don't speak English as my first language.1) we call eachother babe/baby, is that the title people only use on their special someone?2) Is "honey", "sugar" something people use to their close friends as well? What about "sweetheart"? 3) A guy texted my boyfriend calling him "honey"...is it just joking or...does it actually mean he's gay?4) My bf sometimes ends a letter/text to me with "kisses" but it seems his female friends also use it when texting him, does it mean anything?Thanks!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2011): Girls usually end messages with kisses and it doesnt always mean anything sinister. A lot of guys dont end messages with kisses unless its someone they like. A babe is someone sexy. So it should be used with caution really but some use it when speaking to everyone! Darling means someone whos very dear to you, again it should be used with caution but some use it when speaking to everyone! Most terms of endearment should be kept for those we love but it doesnt work like that anymore. Its best to ask your boyfriend what he means when hes calling you or other girls by these terms of endearment. My partner used to call me Hun and Babe. At first i was quite flattered until i found out he called all women by those names. Now he calls me sweetheart and thats my special name. In fact since we had a talk about it, i think hes stopped using terms of endearment for women he doesnt know. I havent heard him calling them babe or hun for ages. Talk to your boyfriend and ask what he actually means when using names for women and see if you can work out special names for each other.
A
female
reader, Abella  +, writes (3 January 2011):
 in every language there are words that mean different things depending on:
The tone used to pronounce it
The situation
Who is saying it to who
'babe and baby' usually implies a close sexual relationship.
Though some over familiar men or women may toss the word around
without it meaning as much
Honey, sweetheart, sugar ought to mean something, but some people with a narrow vocabulary don't seem to recognise this. And use the words as a device to imply they have a closeness with all and sundry - and end up coming across as shallow and false. The same word for every one you meet from the delivery man, the customer you are serving, through to the Bank manager is not appropriate. But some people still do it , out of ignorance.
I would find a guy calling a guy Honey as unusual, unless he is one of the ignorant people above.
#Honey and Sweetheart can be a reassuring way for an adult to address a child ('Honey, Mom will get a bandage, you're going to be OK')
#It can be a familiar way two people, in a marriage, who know each other, and like
each other often refer to each other as an endearment (Honey, phone's ringing but I've got flour all over my hands, can you get it? Thanks Honey')
#in a patronising tone it can border on insult, especially female to female ('Honey, don't try to tell me how to suck eggs'
If you want unique private words of endearment make up your own, other words you can use (in private) for your man are 'darling, sexy, awesome guy, my powerhouse, my hero, my prince, mr special - have faith in your guy, and talk things over with him regularly
Xxxx at the end of the message are not something to worry about unless the content of the message is sexually explicit or worrying.
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A
male
reader, Cerberus_Raphael  +, writes (3 January 2011):
 1) Babe/baby is usually a word used on someone you adore, someone precious to you.
2) That really depends on the person, some people are casual about calling people "honey" or "sweetheart", I would think in a relationship it means more.
3) I suspect it is just a joke
4) I would be wary of those girls, they seem like the flirtatious type although (and I am extremely doubtful of this) they could just be overtly friendly.
Your english is perfect by the way!
I hope that helps.
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