A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:ok, ive been trying to date this girl, she wants to date me too but she said she isnt ready cause she got out of a 2 year relationship in Feb. understandable i am not pressuring her but my friend also likes her and wants to date her and he has been following her wherever she goes. How do i know she isnt just messing with me and how do i know when she wants to date? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 May 2008): All you can do is go by what she says and respect her wishes. Just stay friendly but don't ask her out unless you see definite signs that she wants you to.
I hope you get interested in someone else soon, who is interested in you.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 May 2008): This girl is wise to be cautious. You should never date anyone after a recent split up, the rebound factor then takes places. Just be patient. If someone is worth having then it is worth waiting for and if your friend is also chasing after her, then he could spoil it for himself, because she will get sick of him being around and tell him to get lost. Either way, just be respectful of her wishes and i am sure the best person will win. If it isnt you then be prepared to move on and ask someone else, there are plenty more lovely girls out there and you deserve to meet one.
take care
xx
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 May 2008): Sounds like this girl is being very carefull. She just got out of a long term relationship. She might still have feelings for her ex. He may have treated her badly and she may be scared of being hurt again.
Or she might be like me. When I finnish a relationship (or have been dumped by somebody) I like to take time out to be on my own. Clear my head so to say. Don't pressure this girl, give her the time she needs. The best thing you can do is to try to be her friend. If you treat her nicely, when she's ready to date again, she'll think of your kindness and might consider you for a date.
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A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (15 May 2008):
 You don't know what is crossing her mind, so you can't possibly know when she will want to date again. You should avoid becoming a nuisance, so let her be.
If she does date your friend, you will know that she was messing with you, and you will be able to move on. If not, then you might have a chance.
Some people are ready to date again very soon after their relationships. Some others are not, but do get involved with someone else as a rebound, as we know. I guess you should avoid being just a rebound.
Wait and see.
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