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female
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anonymous
writes: Hello guys,I've been in a relationship with my boyfriend for about 4 years now, been friends for six. A lot of it was long distance because I was going to college in the U.S. and he lives in the UK. I spent a year studying abroad in the UK and looved it.Well now I've actually gotten a job offer over there and it seems like my lifelong dream of moving to England is becoming reality. I'll have a job, a home, and him, all in the country I've always desired to live in.But today this hit me like a ton of bricks. I'm moving to England.I'm leaving behind my family.My friends that I've known and loved my whole life.I'm leaving behind America. A country with its problems, but it's a place I've called my home for 21 years.I am so afraid and sick about this. I keep reassuring myself that living a life without this man and this job would be torture. But as someone who was always a bit of a homebody, it's going to hurt so badly to leave everyone behind in the U.S.Any words of advice?
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female
reader, urb78 +, writes (4 October 2006):
 i live in the UK, and i have to say that it is very much like the US, (apart form it is colder and it rains a lot), you will find new friends and you will still keep in contact with your family and old friends. and remember, that home is just a plane journey away.
A
female
reader, Green_Eyes +, writes (16 September 2006):
 Hi there,
I think that your heart is in the UK with your boyfriend. It seems to me that you're having last minute panics, which is perfectly understandable - your head is battling with your heart! In long distance relationships (I am in one myself), there comes a point where, if you want a life together, something has to change. Just think, after all the 'to-ing and fro-ing,' you and him can finally settle down and enjoy your lives together.
Your family and friends over in the US will always be there for you, unconditionally. It is a long way away and phone calls are never the same as seeing people face to face, but it's not as though you'll never see them again. You'll make friends in the UK - we're welcoming people :) but you'll also never lose your friends back home. The fact that you have a job lined up is fantastic - that's some sort of immediate security. It will be weird for a while, as it'll be so different, but a change is healthy once in a while.
If you do decide to bite the bullet and move, all the best to you. And if you don't, I think that you'll always be wondering 'what if...?' Take a chance. Xx
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A
female
reader, DrPsych  +, writes (16 September 2006):
 Don't think of it as leaving the US forever, just think of it as going to the UK for a little while...nothing is forever and the experience of living abroad is great. Book an open ticket so you can go home when you want. You must remember you are not going on your own like many people who move for a job. You have got yourself a nice man who you have been in a stable relationship with for years and he is already established here in the UK. So, it may feel all chaotic right now with a new job, new country etc but in a few months things will calm down and you will probably be very happy indeed. Remember with the cost of flights these days, you can always pop back home when you like and you can always invite your family over to stay once you are established here! Good luck.
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A
female
reader, confussed jane +, writes (16 September 2006):
hun no how you feel in the next year or so i plainin move away from mine to go live with my boyfriend and i no my parents wont like him and wont like me movin away not even hafe an hour away never mind about half a day but i really want to but just dont no i dont want to lose them.
i think you should talk to them tell thm ur plans and how you feel about your boyfriend they should aunderstand and be happy for you.
good luck xxxx
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A
female
reader, confused3473 +, writes (16 September 2006):
 I am totaly the same My bf lives away but I cant take the thought of leaving my family to be with him They are my security blanket, where im comfitable.
We all have to get to this stage at somepoint and its harder when you have had a good home life A part of you doesnt wanna let it go
Once you get here im sure you will be kept busy with your great job and partner.
When you get here how about trying some of these. Get a mobile contract with a good deal on international calling. How about seting up a web cam link so you can see and talk to people back home. Im sure your friends would luv a holiday in the uk with you so why not invite them here for holidays. If it is possible maybe try to invite them at different times and then it spreads out the time between visits
Take care and good luck
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