A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:so me and this friend of mine started hooking up...at the time he had told me he had broken up with his girl.... so we went out lunch , ice cream walk on the beach.... we start having sex .... so one day idk how but i found out he was still with his girl.... then the whole family is home all of a sudden. wow im freaked out enough i know his brothers i dont want them to think that im one of those lil whores out there i just dont want people to think kandi oh yeah shes a hoe....!! this was just casual sex between two friends... that has turn into disaster!!! im embarrassed to show my face to his brothers and him. i havent talked to him since then...do i continue to talk to him as friends and pretend nothing happen??? does this make a whore or anything like this? what am i supposed to do ???what would u think of me if that was ur brother or ur boyfriend?keep in mind he lied to me although i should have made clear he was to be single!!!!i am not a bf stealer nor do i want to be Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, empty-1  +, writes (15 October 2009):
You know what Emily... I am a man and I don't have huge double standards. Further, if I had a brother who behaved like that I'd slap him around for ruining the family name.Take your sexist crap and stuff it. It's the same hateful shit slinging that you're so pissed off at "men" for that you can't see that you've focused so much on your enemy you've become him. Open your eyes and see the forest through the trees!Men aren't the only ones who cheat, lie, and treat others with disrespect. My wife of 10 years, the mother of my three children cheated on me with my sister's husband.I suppose you'll find a way to make that MY fault?I must be abusive, neglectful, terrible in bed, generally boring, have cheated myself, or some other such bullshit right!?Not to hear her tell it. Fact of the matter is, I forgave her, despite the soul rendering wound she dealt me, and she never tried to blame any portion of it on me. Quite the contrary, every time I get to thinking somehow, I must have been inadequate in some way or another, she goes to great lengths to show me just how wrong that line of thought is.We don't need your counterproductive feminazi proaganda here. go peddle your hate eleswhere.
A
female
reader, Emilysanswers  +, writes (14 October 2009):
They are men, so they are just going to think of you as the girl their brother was having sex with.
If you have a casual relationship with a guy then his brothers are going to think you are a whore anyway.
Men have huge double standards.
As for the boyfriend stealing part, they don't care. They only care that their brother was doing 2 girls at the same time.
Just hold your head up and pretend nothing happened, but you might want to spend as little time with them as possible.
Good Luck!! xx
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 October 2009): Sweetie, you were duped into believing he was single - he is the jerk and the liar and the cheat!!
Please remember that his family will believe his stories before they will believe yours, so make a graceful departure from the relationship!
I would be tempted to go and apologise to the gf for what has happened, but usually its the other woman that get crucified not the lying cheating bf!!
Limit your contact with this guy and dont have sex with him again!!
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