A
male
age
30-35,
*alonZurfluh
writes:Okay, i have a girlfriend that i love to death, but sometimes i have some problems that i dont really know the names for. To start off, shes has a troubled past of family problems, drug problems, and boyfriend problems. I, myself, have self-esteem problems or something, like jealousy and that kind of thing. For more background info, shes had past relationships, and ive had absolutely none. NOTHING. Shes been cheated on before, but i dont feel like she understands how loyal i am. i do everything for her, i no longer have any female friends, if were walking somewhere and women walk by, i turn and look at her, or kiss her on the cheek or something. if were watching movies and attractive women come on, i dont look at them. I do chores and such for her, anything i can to make sure shes happy. I even take the blame in arguements just so shes happy.Sometimes i feel emotionally abused. shes openly admitted to trying to make me feel bad or getting mad at me over tiny little things, once she makes me feel bad or get upset, she gets mad at me for feeling that way.Im with her every day, feel like i cant do anything else. On the days we cant be together, if im not texting her 24 7 she gets upset with me.I feel like she doesnt realize the amount i do just for her. She gets mad at me or upset over the most ridiculous little things, sometime i feel like shes using me as a puching bag or something. Like shes taking me for granted and knows ill just take it. The most recent thing she got mad at me for, which was today, was that her two male friends, who were counsellers at a horse camp, got fired because a little kid made up a story that they threatened him with a knife. I thought that was a humorous reason to get fired from horse camp. She instantly got mad at me, saying that im insensitive towards her feelings, and that im being mean, and that i dont care about her. She actually insulted me afterwards. Im quite sensitive to her feelings. i do anything to make sure she feels heard in our relationship, to the point where my feelings dont even matter. I never tell her when im upset, when i do, she gets mad. The dumb thing is, this fight today was over text messages. i dont get to see her until tomorrow.Someone PLEASE give me some advice.p.s. i dont want to break up with her.
View related questions:
jealous, text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Dr.Ski  +, writes (2 August 2010):
Good, Im glad things are better, and im glad i could help! x
A
male
reader, TalonZurfluh +, writes (2 August 2010):
TalonZurfluh is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you everyone. it looks like everythings gonna be great. i confronted her and she realized what i was saying and understood what had to happen
...............................
A
male
reader, Jmtmj  +, writes (31 July 2010):
 Ever tried doing a 1000 piece jigsaw puzzle? When you pick up two pieces and find out they don't fit together, do you
a) try to smash the two pieces together regardless of whether they are compatible or not
or
b) once you find out they don't fit you go searching for another puzzle piece that actually fits together
???
She's not right for you dude, you can keep trying to make things work between you two or you can move on and find someone who will be so much better for you. If you're anything like me you'll keep trying to smash the pieces together... but I hope for your sake that you're smarter than me.
Best of luck :)
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (31 July 2010): You don't want to break up with her, huh? Well, OK...
You're letting your girlfriend walk all over you and your feelings. You do everything for her and get nothing in return except hatefulness and jealousy. This is not a relationship, my friend, regardless of any love you may feel toward her and vice-versa. She is emotionally abusive to you, and it's honestly probably time you just got out.
I know you don't want to break up with her; no one wants to break up with anyone. We all want our relationships to be perfect and happy and wonderful. But the harsh reality is that they frequently aren't, and we can't punish ourselves by staying in an unhealthy relationship - and that's what yours is, I'm sad to say.
...............................
A
female
reader, Dr.Ski +, writes (31 July 2010):
Sounds like you are the punchbag.. Not that she doesnt love you or anything but, you let her walk all over you from the start, You made yourself out too be a big softy! well now is your chance too stand up too her, and tell her exactly how your feeling. If she really loves you she will understand, and she will offer a hand too sort things through, if not, then i dont think this relationship is worth having. :) x
...............................
|
