A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I'm so into my boyfriend but I can't be intimate... I don't know why!We have been before... We have been friends for a long time, had a fling, for a reason too long to get into we didn't see each other for a while, now we've got back in touch, feelings are still there, but I'm finding it hard to be intimate and the more time goes on, the more I wind myself up over it.It may sound really silly... But I just don't know how to get out of this rut... Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 December 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThe thing is, he didn't hurt me in the past, and the hardest thing is he's such a decent guy, by far the nicest boyfriend I've ever had, and would do anything for me.
I really want to sleep with him, I feel ready, but I just find myself holding back and I don't knwo what's wrong with me.
A
female
reader, lacexoxo22  +, writes (17 December 2008):
 Well if you feel you "need to get out of the rut" you shouldn't be thinking about sex with him again. There's a reason why your hesitating and I think it's because your afraid, which is totally understandable. I'm absolutely on your side with this and I dont even know you, I just know how you feel. It's like, he's hurt you before, and your thinking twice about "giving yourself up" to him again, setting yourself up for stronger and more intimate feelings with him, not knowing how it will end up....just figuring 'history will repeat itself'. Not saying that people don't change, but it's rare. This is solely your decision, no one should be pressuring you into doing anything. If you don't want to have sex with him, don't. Don't feel like your being stupid, or immature or selfish about it, it's how you feel and sex is supposed to be consensual and "good" for both people, you want to get the same thing he's getting out of it....and if your doubting it, it's not gonna happen, your more then likely going to end up feeling used and taken advantage of, and that's the last thing you want! Good luck with everything and if you need more advice, just e-mail me [email address blocked] Hope I helped you a little at least :-)
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