A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Well first off i'll tell you a bit about myself. I am very shy and chances are i wont talk to you when i first meet you unless forced and even then i only give one word answers. I'm very straight forward about things i do not sugar coat anything. My friends are used to me and always introduce me as rude. I want to know is there a way of breaking out of this cycle? Stop being so rude?
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female
reader, BettyBoup  +, writes (28 March 2011):
 Nice advice guys. I watched this question because I struggle with shyness. Sometimes it is just so hard to get out of my comfort zone and I make it worse for myself by feeling bad about it and feeling ashamed about keeping myself to myself so much. I know where you are coming from, so don't worry you are not alone! It's important to remember there is nothing wrong with you for being the way you are, everyone is different and entitled to be who they are! But like others have said, it can be lonely when you don't speak to people you meet. There are so many different, interesting people out there who it would be a joy to get to know and who would love to get to know you too.I know it isn't easy, when you have got in the habit of being quiet in social situations, to change and speak out. But if you're not happy being that way you can change it. Think back over your life, was there a time when you felt more able to chat to people? Can you remember what that was like? Try to embody that feeling again. You can be confident talking to people, you just need to get out of your rut and once you do it will get easier. And don't beat yourself up if it doesn't come easily or feel natural at first. Underneith, EVERYONE is a little insecure about how other people see them, it's natural. Some people have just learnt how to overcome those feelings, and you can too.Good luck :)
A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 March 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you all for your advice. I will take note and do as you all suggested. Thank you :)
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A
male
reader, Maverickjuniper  +, writes (28 March 2011):
I think it is very important that you have recognized this issue. First thing fist, though. Please realize that there is nothing wrong with you. Don't let this bring you down or make you feel insignificant. I see that you are in an age group that are often in college. If your not in college then disregard this next sentence. If you are in college a great way to develop your people skills and communication skills is to register for a communications class or get involved with group activities. You are unique. Your personality is one of a kind and you should embrace it. Do realize, though, that interacting with different personality types throughout your life will require you to adapt and perform in a way that will enhance and align with others personalities. I think the first thing you should concentrate on is stepping out of your comfort zone. This is often the hardest part of transforming your communication skills. It is just a matter of doing it!Once you find yourself stepping out of your comfort zone more, start integrating skills that you have picked up by reading self help books such as "how to win friends and influence people" This is truly a life changing book if you read it. It had helped me when I was trying to develop better skills as I started to lead a team of employees. I also noticed that it helped me with my relationships and family life.You are not rude. You are simply unique. If your friends continue to introduce you as some unattractive character then, no offense intended, you need to find new friends.Get some good self help books. They really to just that-help.
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A
female
reader, Ima FreAk! +, writes (27 March 2011):
 Hiyaaaa,I think you need to be a bit open more and s-m-i-l-e!!!! :DIf people approach you say hi or even put a smile on and say how are you etc... make a small conversation. Try and avoid one word sentences and really get to know the person and try and find out something that you both have in common with!Trust me no need to be shy... in fact why don't you start the conversation first, say hello and how are you then maybe ask questions like what did you do yesterday etc... because by you approaching can break the barrier of you being shy and maybe find out that it's not so bad after all because there are nice lovely people out there willing to talk to you. Remember WAFFLE! Honestly just go on and on about anything like what happening in the news, celebrities (who do you find hot and not ha ha!), hobbies what you don't and do like so waffle and talk about random topics, to keep conversation flowing.There are people that want to know you and maybe you want to know them and your gonna get no where in life if you sit and wait so go out there and make friends! World is full of potential friends!!! :)Hope my advice helps!Good luck (hope you come outta the shell!)Lots of love,Ima FreAk!x
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A
female
reader, xxpoptartsxx33 +, writes (27 March 2011):
Yes there is! you need to be more open about starting conversations. Be like "Oh hey there how are you?" or "What's up?" Try getting to know more people it's more fun that way. Stop using one word answers too! good luck:)
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