A
male
age
30-35,
*en345
writes:I am 18 and interested in a girl who has joined our friendship group [the same age]. She is quite flirty, especially the second time we all went out together, where she was keen to dance get quite close. Nothing has happened, although I pecked her on the lips jokingly on the night out as we separated to go home. I get really jealous when she dances with other guys at these places, and would love to date her, but at the same time not lose the friendship. Should I tell her I like her? We are so flirty anyway there is not much else I can do in terms of hinting. I am not completely happy about her signals and suspect she may see me more as a mate, so don't want to abuse that. Should I keep it secret and wait, at risk of her finding someone else?
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (4 June 2011):
 Exactly, plus the longer you leave it the more you will be stressed and worried and there is really no point to that at all. So go for it and let us no how you get on. Good Luck!!
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (4 June 2011): ok so next time u see her u should be like "oh hey i need to talk to u about something which i hope afterward if u reject we can stay friends" tell her ur feelings and be like "so is it that u like me or are just naturally flirty with ur actions cause i need to know" u know that way u guys can stay friends even after if she rejects u
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A
male
reader, ben345 +, writes (4 June 2011):
ben345 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThis is good advice. I fear the longer I leave it I will just read into it and into it and kinda spoil it, I might just casually make a move next week at the club. That way, if she says no, we can carry on as friends more easily. Leaving it too long and confessing would be kinda awkward, and not so easy to move on from
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty +, writes (4 June 2011):
Well I agree to a certain point with Dear Mandy, some people are really just natural flirts and don't mean for people to pick up the wrong signals. But I don't think you should wait a few weeks, I don't see the point in waiting around. At the end of the day it sounds like you both get on great together as friends, which yes can be a great basis for a relationship if both parties are interested.
If I were you I would keep things light. Tell her that you like her and ask her how that makes her feel. However if she seems to go quiet just explain to her that there is no reason why you liking her should effect your friendship if she doesn't feel the same way and just see how she reacts. If she tells you she is not interested well yes you may feel a bit disappointed but sweetie at least then you will know that you tried your best and you were honest with her. Good Luck.
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A
female
reader, Dear Mandy +, writes (4 June 2011):
 Hi
some girls are naturally flirty and do not know it, they think they are just being fun, and everyone is enjoying the moment, so I wouldn't read into it just yet, wait a while and see if anything else will come of it. Although I can see your point of not liking that kind of reaction, as you dont know what to say or do incase of rocking te boat. Just wait a few more weeks and if it's still the same, then ask her what she is looking for right now, weather freinds or a relationship, But please dont be upset or agrivated by this, some people find being flirty and fun is a way of expressing their self and dont mean no harm, and cant understand when people miss judge them :( xx
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