A
female
age
36-40,
*izzyb6938
writes:My boyfriend and I (both 22) have been dating about 5 months. Things are going pretty well, he said he loved me three wks ago, but we don't talk as much as I would like. We can only really see each other twice a week (because of hour distance btwn our houses, work etc) and prob communicate every second (sometimes third) day on the phone. I find this really difficult as it feels like were in a relationship when were together but like i'm single when were apart and i really miss him. I have alot of issues stemming from failure of my previous long term relationship where I got burnt very badly. As a result I'm paranoid and silly and I can't talk about what I want because I feel like I'll drive another one away. I'm really falling for him but I'm terrified he'll get over me. We had a bit of an off day yesterday and I went home really sad coz I know we won't talk for like two days... help!! Reply to this Question
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female
reader, ilaila  +, writes (25 January 2010):
He said he loves you and guys don't just let that slip out if they don't mean it. He obviously cares about you. My husband and I have been doing the long distance relationship for the past two years. He travels for work and so is gone for a month or two and then home for the same amount of time before he leaves again. I only say that to let you know that I really do understand the long distance relationship. It's difficult but one thing that will help the relationship to be successful is to focus on great communication. When you can't see each other every day and telephone communication is sometimes all you have it becomes that much more important. You don't have to be clingy or make him feel like now that he's said he loves you your expectations have drastically changed but you need to communicate your needs to him and find a solution that works for both of you. If you approach it/start the conversation in such a way that you let him know how happy you are with him and with your relationship then let him know that you wish you guys had more time together/ communicated more on days when you can't be together. Work together on finding a way to meet your need of communicating be it more phone calls, an e-mail or text or whatever meets your need. Who knows - he may feel the same way and just didn't want to cramp your space. Good luck - I hope you both will be very happy together! I'm sure this will work out just fine!
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