A
male
age
36-40,
*ugam
writes:Dear Mr.SamsonWell, I stumbled upon your site through one of the search engines. Went through it and must say that you're doing excellent work.Thought I might as well share my problem with you and the forums here and see if there could be a solution available...I am studying at a medical school and shall be graduating as a doctor in about 6 months from now.We have been here for the last 4 years and I gradually developed a liking for a girl in my class and this happened about 3 years back.She is an Indian girl, a bit reserved, when it comes to talking to boys. Otherwise, she is good natured and jovial most of the times...Now, my first mistake was that I ended up sharing my feelings for her with a friend from where it travelled through people and she heard of it and completely stopped talking to me. Earlier, we just used to greet each other and that's it. But after she heard of this, she even stopped this.Anyways, I didn't do anything about it then..Tried talking to her once, but she always tries to avoid me or if she doesn't have an option, replies very dry, I mean, just repies in a yes or no.About one year back, I wrote her an Email conveying my feelings. But She never responded.Tried calling her up a month back to directly speak to her but she replied that she's not free and hung up.Yes, she's in my class but I don't want to hold her up there and speak to her because it can create a scene and also, she might feel uncomfortable in my presence henceforth.Now that there are only 6 months left for both of us to leave med school, I fear that I might lose her forever.Moreover, I'm sure that I am not infatuated. It seems to be true love. Never fantasized about her.. If asked what would I do if I get her.. My answer would be that I just want to kiss her forehead and hold her in my arms.. I'm ready to be selfless for her and perhaps that's why I've been waiting so long...Please tell me what should I do?Thanks a ton! Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Country Woman  +, writes (20 April 2008):
 Could this girl be promised to another man do you think, i.e. could her family have an arranged marriage planned for her?
She does sound like a very reserved girl and the only true way of finding out is to perhaps give her a note but ask her to read it on her own and you do not expect anything in return but would appreciate it if you could at least be friends and she may then take the note.
In the note ask her outright whether you have offended her in any way or acted inproperly as this was never your intention.
Ask her if she is promised to another or has a boyfriend waiting for her as you would never want to put her into an uncomfortable position but as she has NEVER told you what you have done to make her feel uncomfortable you would just like to get to the truth as you could then move forward even as friends.
Hope this may help in some small way.
Keep us posted eh!
BFN
Country Woman
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