A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:ok so 3 days ago i found out im pregnant with my ex boyfriends baby and we dont really know what to do! i think we should get married and so do many of my family members. my gramma says she will drive and pay for the whole thing but we are scared and he is still unsure! i myself dont want my baby to grow up in two homes with two lives and i dont want my baby around any girlfriend of his and he does not want our baby around any boyfriends of mine!even if it does not work out in the future i want our baby to be able to say my parents tried their hardest to make it work against all odds! i dont want him/her to think that we didnt do everything possible to give him/her as normal of a life as possible! we do still love eachother but we were not seeing eye to eye in the relationship so we called it off! i felt he needed to grow up a little more and he didnt want to! well now that im pregnant he is going to have to if he wants to be in his/hers life! he is more than willing to be there and help with anything i or the baby needs but i dont want to push him into a marrage and i dont want to be a single mother at 22! he just started wyotech last month and loves it but when he found out he wanted to quit to be here for me and the baby but i strongly urged against it so he stayed in school (thank god) he fears that if he gets married now his family will disown him yet my family has said they would be there 100% to help in any way as long as we got married! there has even been talk of renting us my grampas old house for only $400 a month! now with me i have wanted to get married for a few years now i fell its time! but he is only 19 and has never really been out on his own i have been since i was 17! i do love him he is a great guy and i know we could make it work as long as we tried but i dont know how to explain this to him without making him feel traped!
View related questions:
my ex Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, jaime90  +, writes (9 July 2009):
 This sounds like the same situation my boyfriend was in with his ex. He broke up with her when she was pregnant because they were not getting along anymore and she persisted to call and beg for him back to give it another shot even when he didn't love her anymore. there is a reason you broke up. would you prefer your child to be brought up in a home where his parents are constantly fighting and don't love each other? or with two loving parents.
you were the one who had sex before you were married, so you obviously knew there was a risk of getting pregnant, so you took on that responsibility. don't punish him and try and force him into marriage now.
|
