A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'm in high school and pregnant, I decided to give my baby up for adoption but in the meantime people keep on calling me nasty names even the guy that is the father who I'm still dating, that's another thing he is so nice out of school but ever since I told him I was pregnant he treats me like nothing in school. Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, xSavannax +, writes (21 February 2010):
Try to ignore those people, and if people ask why you did that then you tell them it was for the babys good, to keep the babys safe and protected.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 December 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionSorry hadnt been able to get back i been relly busy latley i had a baby girl on November 21. She is with her adopted parents now.Her name is Bella Marie (after Bella Swan in Twilight and me)She was 6 pounds 2 onces also last year my school did have a sex ed.I just want to thank everyone who supported me. THANKYOU
...............................
A
female
reader, sassy d +, writes (22 August 2009):
i want to thank you for putting your child up for adoption they really do deserve the life you aren't ready to give them a steady home life means a lot. we was suppose to adopt my husbands cuzs baby girl had everything ready except bottles and milk she was dialtated to 2 and had her mom call and tell us she changed her mind it really hurt. she just had our little breanna wed and she kept the name we was gonna give her. we've been married 15 years and no baby yet sad in tennessee
good luck
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 August 2009): I am a thrity year old mother of six beautiful girls. Sweet heart is is your choice to do what you feel is right for your child no matter who judges you. I feel that if you choose to give away your child it would be better than ending it's life though abortion but evryone has their choices
I was also pregnant at seventeen and my first child is now nineteen married and had a child on her own. Weigh your options. Do you have a support system? Are you able to sacrifice certain parts of your youth to be a full time Mom and provider to your child? Is the father able to support you and if not can you do it alone? If in the end your decision is to give up your baby then so be it do so.
I too am available should you wish to contact me for support. You can email me at [email address blocked] and upon then I will give you more information to talk to me and my daughters. I failed to mention, my seventeen year old just gave birth last week and she is doing well with her support system in our family unity.
you will be ok;)
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 July 2009): I am so sorry that you are suffering from the words of unkind people. When I was your age, I was in the same situation, and my boyfriend insisted on an abortion, which out of love for him, I agreed to. However, it was the easy, silent way out... so I received no harsh comments, no feedback, nothing but emptiness and an eventual break-up from him because he claimed that people can not get over that.Since then, while I respect that the law allows us to make those decisions on our own, I have so admired the teens who choose to tough it out, and endure the temporary storm in the name of making a choice that is not so final. The very people who say hurtful things to you will find themselves in difficult situations and they will feel regret for hurting you. And you will know how to treat others when you see them in difficult situations.If you are still planning to place your child for adoption, my fiance and I would be happy to consider adopting him or her, especially as I still feel a debt to society in the decision I made so many years ago.In any case, you have a friend in Tennessee who admires you and encourages you to stand tall and help your peers learn what a real woman can achieve. Sending you a little of the warmth and love that you deserve,
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 March 2009): Hi there. I came across your posting and it struck home with me when I was your age. My best friend got pregnant our sophomore year in highschool. She too decided that she was going to give the baby up for adoption and she too was receive nasty name calling and everything you can imagine. Let me tell you being her best friend and supporting her decision made me part of the "joke" if you will. I can tell you from experience it will pass. Things in life will get better. I won't lie they may get worse before getting any better but it WILL happen. I can also tell you that you are stronger,more couragious than any of the people calling you names. You are putting another life before your own because you feel it's right. Only you can make that decision for your baby. GOOD FOR YOU!!! Have you found an adoptive family for your baby yet?
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 March 2009): I only found this site because I have been recently thinking that my husband and I should consider adoption...
I would like you to know that no matter the decision you make, there aren't many things harder than being a teenager in school. You are a very strong girl and will come out of this situation with flying colors. The fact that you are even questioning your childs fate shows that you are wise beyond your years. Thinking of the child is the best thing that you can do right now. There are many, many families out there that would love nothing more than a baby to adopt. This predicament of yours may very well end up being the answer to another womans prayers. One that she has had for years. My advice to you would be that everyone has a story. Something that they have overcome, something that they are going through, something that they have been affected by. Make your story great. Do what you can to provide a great life for this baby. Good luck.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 March 2009): I'm so sorry that you're getting called names. The fact of the matter is, you're making a very wise decision. It shows that you want whats best for your baby and you're not being selfish. Their immaturity by judging you is wrong and they will be judged for it. You stick to your guns and hang in there, you will be blessed for making the right choice. My husband and I have 4 adopted children and are so thankful for them everyday. They are truly gifts from God. We would love to adopt again and provide another child the love and support we give our other children. I love being a mother, it's my full time job. I hope when you get older and you're stable in life you can find out what that feels like. Good luck to you and May God Bless your decision.
...............................
A
female
reader, wonderingcat  +, writes (3 March 2009):
 Teen pressures are hard and difficult to deal with. As Jessica04 said, you already have risen above the rest.
You made a mistake by getting pregnant. But you have become a strong young adult by owning up to your mistake and keeping your head high in school. You have conquered a great adversity with grace.
Follow Jessica's advice and ask your school counsellor to set up a school session to educate your friends on sex education. Use yourself as an example. Bring in other teen moms out there, to educate them of the options and how difficult it is to make a decision on those options.
I truly believe that this type of peer sex education will hit home closer than you think. Don't listen to those boos. Listen to the deep silence when your message hits home.
You don't want to have a boyfriend who has two faces, one good in private and one nasty in public.
Love,
Cat
...............................
A
male
reader, andrew loves hali +, writes (3 March 2009):
 dump the guy and just ignore them people then in 10 years when they're pregnent you can go make fun of them just kidding but they dont realize what your going through so just leave it be. good luck
...............................
A
female
reader, jessica04 +, writes (3 March 2009):
 Oh honey, I am so sorry you are on the receiving end of such cruelty.
Dump that boy. If he isn't sticking up for you to other people, then you need to drop him like a bad habit. It is so unfair that society only blames the young mother and never the boy that ran around doing the exact same thing.
I am so proud and thankful that you have decided to give this baby up for adoption. You are already such a strong person for being able to put aside your own feelings and do what is right by you and this baby.
Perhaps you can talk with your principal or some teachers and see if they will let you do some class presentation to show what you are going through. Like some sort of social studies project. Use it to warn other girls about the risks of unprotected sex. If people see that they cannot tear you down, but instead make you stronger, they will let go and run back into their own little caves.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 March 2009): Oh man. I've been guilty myself of getting frustrated with teen moms and saying (or at least thinking) some not so kind things. But the truth is, in the end it's your life and people can say what they want, you still have to deal with the decisions you make.
I think that giving up a baby for adoption can sometimes be exactly the right thing to do. You are going to have to grow up really fast, and unfortunately you will have to be mature when those around you aren't, and feel they have the right to mock you.
Stick to your principles, don't let people walk all over you. Tell them people make mistakes, and that you've manned up to your responsibilities and are doing the best you can. People love to see others "fail", they get a kind of kick out of seeing others in difficult situations, but persevere, and if you play your cards right this could become something in your life that makes you stronger, and more adjusted.
I would also suggest ditching the boyfriend. If he hasn't got the balls to stand by you through this (when, frankly, it's just as much his problem as it is yours) then you need to be rid of him. Concentrate on your schoolwork, stay strong and trust in yourself and the decision you have made.
...............................
A
female
reader, bobbles32  +, writes (3 March 2009):
 It's probably really hard for him to digest and if giving up the baby wasn't his preferance then he's probably feeling bitter about it. Talk to him and tell him that you'd appreciate it if he stopped saying [the stuff you don't like] to you or to anyone else for that matter. about the kids at school.. don't worry. What you did was an excellent choice and I'm proud of you. You followed your heart so ignore the other people. They have probably never been faced with a situation like yours. Stick through it. :)
...............................
|
