A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:my lad mate knows i like him as more than a mate and says he likes me too - were not going out but he wants us to do things with each other but im avoiding it because hes 19, im 15. yesterday we were texting each other and he was being flirty with me, complimenting me and then we started talking about things we wanted to do before we get old (dont know why!). he said he had a list of people he wants to have sex with before hes old and he put me at number 2! this shocked me a bit but, not in a naive way, what does it mean? is this proof he only wants me for one thing? x
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male
reader, thunderbeeast  +, writes (6 April 2008):
When you are older you are going to realize that a 19 year old man who is with a 15 year old is one of a few things. A creep, A total scum bag or a loser. I know you probably don't realize it now but you will when your 19 and consider what it would be like to date a 15 year old and you will regret that you had sex with him.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 April 2008): Run for your life. He's a pervert.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 April 2008): He only has interest insex right now. It seems he realized the purpose of his penis and wants to try it out on as many women he can find. Ever hear "where's the beef?", well, your Number Two on the list. He will probably have another list to: STD's!
Not sure of the laws in the U.K., but in the U.S.A., he could also have another special number added to his list of accomplisments "20!" That would be 20 years in prison for having sex with a minor.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 April 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionCareBear: Lol thats a good one, i might try that!
Happy: Im adamant that i wont lose my virginity to him - afterall, virginity is your most prized possession, right? thanks for the warning! thanks everyone for the answers! x
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A
female
reader, happytochat  +, writes (6 April 2008):
I know what you mean, its really hard to talk to your mum and sister about things like this. When I first had sex when I was 18, I felt alot of pressure from my bf. I didnt feel I could tell my mum or anyone. I thought I was old enough to deal with it myself, I thought I could handle it. BUt turns out I couldnt. I ended up making a bad mistake. I regret that and wish I could of told my mum or someone else so they could guide me. Like you, I didnt want to because I knew my mum would overeact and would tell me to dump him and so on because he is pressuring me and thats not good. However, you have to admit, mums are pretty wise! They have alot of life experience so they can tell when a guy is up to no good. And they ALWAYS have your best intentions at heart. They are the only person who will look out for you all the time.
So maybe its something you could reconsider. Yet I guess you are lucky you have a web site like this you can ask for help on, i never did.
I just would hate to see you make the same mistake as I did. Lets hope you find the strength that i couldnt.
He suggested a relationship for when you are older? So he thinks it is ok to do sexual things with you at 15 but not being a relationship?? That doesnt sound right to me.
I'm glad you are going to be careful.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 April 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionFirstly, thank you for the answers! :-) HappyToChat: i cant tell my sister or mum because they are very protective, sometimes over protective, and will stop me talking to him - i dont want this to happen because, sex talk aside, he is a good mate and i know how far to/not to go with him. He has in fact suggested a relationship but "when im older". i understand now that he might only want me for sex and is trying to take advantage - ill just be careful with what i do with him and tell him. thanks again Laura n Happy! xx
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A
female
reader, happytochat +, writes (6 April 2008):
I'm sorry to say this but it sounds to me like he might only be interested in you for sex. I say this because you said hes telling you what things (I assume sexual type things) he wants to do with you, when you guys are just friends. he hasnt mentioned anything about a relationship as he? If he wanted to be in a relationship, if he wanted more then just sex, then he would make sure to mention it. He would be trying to achieve that before sex. I also think he may just want you for sex because he put you on a list of who he wants to have sex with. He has a list? That says a lot about his values I think. Although, mind you, I would of thought if he was trying to get you into bed that he would of sucked up and said you were his number one. Maybe he didnt want to appear to keen.
Now you said hes 19 and you are 15. Unfortunately, when you are 15 many people see you as vunerable and easily manipulated. They take advantage of this. And my guess is that he is going to try and do this to you.
I suggest you talk to a trusted adult such as your mum, older sibling, teacher, aunty etc, about this before making any further moves with this guy.
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A
female
reader, carebear +, writes (6 April 2008):
 Yes dear it's proof he only want to use you for sex. He's a lot older than you, but still immature. Let him groom someone else or tell him to get someone his own age to play with as they would put him in his place.Also tell him with that attitude he will be still waiting with his list when he's old lol cause girls are getting smart and can spot an ____hole a mile off no matter what age he is.
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A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (6 April 2008):
 It could be just be a random number or there is somebody else which is unavailable but only appear in his dreams.
It could also be true , that he wants only sex from you.
He could have worded it as wanting to marry you.
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