A
male
age
41-50,
*ollidamra
writes:Inexperienced in need of serious help...I'm 30yrs old and have had about 3 sexual experiences with women. my problem is that i don't know what to say or do during sex, and my last encounter was about 8 years ago and the longer it goes on the harder i find it to try and get close to women. I've now come to the point where i'm so petrified of being laughed at for my inexperience at my age that i avoid a situation which might become too intimate. i know this is silly but can't help it. I would like to gain experience before i look for a serious girlfriend and have considered paying an escort to teach me the ropes as such, but again i'm scared of doing this.Please any advice would be appreciated as i'm at my wits end and don't want to grow old alone!!!!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 April 2007): Please don't do it. I had similar problems and thought it would be the answer. It isn't.
It becomes a habbit. An addiction. Which if you are not careful, can ruin your life just like any other addiction. And it's not safe either. You'll end up messing your head up.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 April 2007): A little tip:
I love when my boyfriend takes charge. We exchange in foreplay first to get things really hot and steamy then we do the business. NEVER push her down there or anywhere. I hate that, and probably other girls too. Whisper dirty thing into her ear. Make them romantic though because you don't want to scare her off. Hope that helps!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 April 2007): if you find that you are lacking intimacy in life- please dont rush for anything- as you wil soon regret it. Trust me, many if not almost all girls would love to havea guy who is inexperienced. Find a councelor if you are really afraid that you will hire an escort- that wouldnt be a healthy thing to do..
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 April 2007): Don't do it chuck there are girls out there who would kill to have a boyfriend who hasnt been round the block loads of times I am one of those women. Im of similar age to yourself and and always meet men who have had 20 plus sexual partners and that thought makes me sick. It shows that you dont just see women as objects or excuse my language just a quick shag. You should be proud of yourself not ashamed. When you meet that perfect woman for you she will love you for you and not for what you have to offer in the bedroom department if you know what I mean.
Good Luck
x
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A
female
reader, ingotblue +, writes (17 April 2007):
 I yern to be in your shoes, but I am not and you are.
I would be so happy to have you as my bf, it would make a refreshing change, Single parents arent a minority any more and I cant help feeling that if I am with a man that has children then his ex has something over him and we cant move on cleanly.
In so far as the sex goes, I would kill for a man I could teach. For a man that held on for the "right one" If you have met someone and you have become an item, then letting go of some of your inhibitions and loving them how you want to love them will come naturaly, yes there are techneques that work and sex I guess can be taught.
But no two women are the same, just because that little thing you do with your tongue works on one then theres no gaurentee its going to work on another.
Sex like love is an exploration, be gentle be loving and be attentive, listen to what she says, mimic what she does to you.
Above all communicate
take heart that you are a very special person and that any girl would be very lucky to have you.
Dont rush in to anything and remember that women are people too all these things you are feeling we are feeling too.
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