A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I need advice i've done something stupid and now don't know what to say to them! On Saturday night this girl I met asked me out on a date and I was still pretty drunk when I accepted it and I was sure at the time it was what I wanted and that I wanted to go on a date with her...Thing is, only two months ago I broke up with my girlfriend who I'm still in love with even though I've tried so hard to move on. I'm sure if I met someone who made me feel that way again i'd be able to move on, but I didn't feel that way with her and i'm not sure I will either. I know i'm shutting it down so quickly, but truth is i'm not ready to go out with someone else yet and I don't want to because it's not fair to do that to someone. I know it's a harmless date, but I don't want to go on a date with someone else until I am definitely sure I am over her or at least until those feelings have faded. I don't know what to tell the girl because she really liked me and I know I gave her the impression I really liked her and wanted to see her again. I feel so bad! But alcohol and that environment always clouds my judgement and makes me think I want something that I don't! What should I say to her? I just feel so terrible right now!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (18 March 2013):
 tell her exactly what you told us
your breakup is fresh
you are not ready to date
you like her but don't want a relationship and are not ready to get involved with anyone and don't want to lead her on....
and admit that you had too much to drink and got carried away
the thing is if you do this, you may not get a second chance with her...
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (18 March 2013):
 Fess up. Apologize profusely. Tell her what you said to us, that you did not mean to lead her on, but that your consent was alcohol fueled and when sober you realized that you are not ready for dating and that she would be a rebound and going on dates would lead to nothing positive.
Expect her to be upset or annoyed , but surely less than she'd be if you'd waste her time taking her on a date , just to disapeear or give her the runaround right after.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (18 March 2013):
 If you have no intentions of dating then WHY even go ON the date? She isn't there for your amusement. She most likely is looking for someone to date.
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