A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: I am Married to my husband and have 2 daughters but now i have been talking to my Ex boyfriend. i dont know who i really want to be with i love them both?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 October 2008): I was in the same situation. I still have (and maybe always will) have feelings for my ex, but that's because there's a thrill factor & he's more of a bad boy which my husband isn't. But he's also involved with somebody else and has kids as well. There's just too much risk and a lot to lose hooking up with him. Unfortunately, something tragic happened to him and he past away. In a way, I feel bad for saying this, but feel a little relief now that cheating on my husband is obviously out of the question now.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 October 2008): I am married to a wonderful man and I DID get involved with an ex. Take it from me, it is not worth it! At the time I got involved with my ex again, I'd been married 25 years. It was sooo exciting to hear my ex talk about how I was his "dream girl" who got away. Made me feel sexy and young again. We had an affair for 8 years without my husband's knowledge. Believe me, it didn't take all that long for me to remember why we broke up in the first place but by then I was way too emotionally involved. We finally put an end to it about 8 months ago and I am still dealing with the emotional aftermath. Gratefully, my sweet husband never had an inkling, in spite of the fact that I diverted all of the emotional energy into a relationship that was really so much less rewarding than the one I already had with my husband. I robbed my husband of the love and attention I should have given him. If I felt bored or unappreciated, I should have talked with him about it. The irony is, the attraction I feel for my ex is so strong and he can't hold a candle to my husband.
Any way, take my advice, work on your marriage and cut off all contact with your ex. Don't play with fire. I promise you, if you blow your marriage for your ex everylast one of you will suffer.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 October 2008): Dear Poster
Country Woman gave you a good answer; I merely want to point out to you; REMEMBER there is a reason why your ex is your EX; don't forget what went wrong and don't confuse the reality with illusions of what things might be like with your EX.
I do suggest you seek counseling on your own first to help you to clear your mind; and then if need be ask your husband to go with you for a few sessions.
You are not giving much info, but it sounds as if your marriage but be in serious need of help; maybe you should consider "spicing things up" at home; bring some flirting and excitement back into your marriage; I am doing footwork in the dark hear, as you don't mention what is wrong or went wrong between you and hubby; but I do hope that you can try and resolve your marital problems.
Please forward more info then we might be able to have better insight and give you more spesific advice.
Best wishes; keep us posted and always keep SMILING.
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A
female
reader, ROSETTE43 +, writes (9 October 2008):
YOU MAY FEEL YOU LOVE THEM BOTH BUT TRUST ME YOU ARE IN LOVE WITH ONE AND LOVE THE OTHER, SOMETIMES WE LOVE THE ONE THAT IS NOT AS GOOD TO US AS THE OTHER MORE, BUT EVEN KNOW WE DO WE MUST THINK ABOUT WHO WILL BE THE BEST IN THE LONG RUN? WHO HAS YOUR BACK THE MOST? AND WHO LOVES YOU THE MOST? NOT JUST WHO YOU LOVE THE MOST BECAUSE LIFE IS SHORT AND I RATHER BE WITH SOMEONE THATS GOING TO BE THERE FOR THE LONG RUN THEN SOMEONE THATS THERE JUST FOR NOW~
WE CALL THEM (MR RIGHT NOW)
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A
female
reader, Country Woman  +, writes (9 October 2008):
 How long have you been married?
You still seem quite young and I wonder if the normality of marriage is not what you thought it might be?
You don't say anything about your relationship with your husband or how old your children are?
Your ex is just that your ex and you have entered into a serious relationship which your ex I am guessing is fully aware of.
How long were you with your ex and why did you break up?
I think the fact that you are torn right now could be the fact that your ex offers you a thrill/excitement factor that may be lacking in your marriage but you do have 2 children to consider in all of this and also the fact that you mention you love both your husband and your ex.
To go with your ex could cost you so much in terms of your marriage and your children and it would be something I would not encourage right now. I think you need to address the problems in your marriage and talk to your husband about what is going on with you. I think for now you need to keep your ex out of the picture as he is obviously clouding your judgement and that just isn't right.
You need to consider maybe some counselling if your marriage is in crisis in any way.
You could also be needing assurance that you are still the woman you want to be and maybe you have lost sight of that now that you are a mum and wife and maybe it is your own insecurities that are drawing you to your ex at the moment, maybe it is the attention your ex is giving you but he has to understand that talking is one thing but taking things further could be so detrimental to you and should not be taken lightly.
Keep us posted eh!
BFN
Country Woman
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