A
female
age
36-40,
*utieaag
writes:My ex and I broke up on new years eve, ever since then he is been going back and forth. He would start seeing a girl they see right through him the she split he would come back to me. one time he was dating this girl we both work with and then coming to my house everynight. she found out cut him off then he thought he would be exclusive with me but, then told his friends that he really didnt want me. When we first dated he told me I was the biggest girl he has ever dated and then I lost a whole bunch of weight now He compliments me alot, but his current girl is heavier than me when I was at my heaviest when I was dating him. He has amazing family they do everything for him he never has to worry about anything. He heard I was having surgery and he wanted to help but then he would come over and talk about his new girl and I didnt want to hear it so I told him that I dont need his help. he backed off for a while but now is back saying that we wants me but doesnt want to be serious with me or anyone. He found picture of this new guy I am seeing and compared himself to the new guy. I still find him extremly attactive and he know just what to say to get me in his arms. I HATE IT. well I have been blowing him off kinda and he is calling me more and texting me more. All my friends think he is gay because of some of the stuff he has been doing or that when I was drunk he has asked me to do to him. I dont want to date him ither i dont want to be known as the girl that turned him gay. But our sexual chemstry is out of this world. Im lost and confused and I need advice.
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female
reader, k_c100  +, writes (29 July 2011):
 Look he just wants sex - he wants you to be his 'friends with benefits' so he can have no strings fun with you and date other girls at the same time.
Either cut him out of your life or you will keep going around in circles. Lock your doors, change your phone number....just get him out of your life otherwise this mess will continue!
A
female
reader, kutieaag +, writes (28 July 2011):
kutieaag is verified as being by the original poster of the questionSo yesterday He started texting me asking if we can hook up and I asked him "are we even friends or am I just good enough for hooking up, because Im clearly good enough to be your rebound girl" he was like "yes were friends but we would have to keep the sex and the friendship apart from each other" Im thinking to myself how the helk can we do this. So I told him the hooking up the other night was just a one time thing. Then he tells me "fine well be friends with hooking up" In my head Im thinking I know I can do it because I have this new guy I really want to get to know. Then he shows up at me house after he gets off work 11pm at night, Im sleeping by the way and I guess I dont know how to lock my door he invites himself in gets in my bed and starts trying to cuddle with me I wake up ask him what he is doing he said that he had some time to kill before he goes to this party. Then he stated asking me questions about my new guy. I told him that out of respect Im not going to tell him, because I dont wanna hear about any of the girls he is hooking up with. He started to say that he think my new guy has an ugly face but a cute body. I didnt say anything because I didnt want to talk about it. He then starts talking about hooking up with me. I told him I though we were going to be friends with out sex. I do really like him, while we were dating I almost thought I might be falling in love with him but I forced myself to think about all the empty promises and him saying I was the fatest girl he ever dated. My friends say use him, but I feel like I can only use him for a little bit before I start liking him again. I find myself getting excited when he texts and this is the 3rd time we have done this whole back and forth thing.
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A
female
reader, k_c100 +, writes (28 July 2011):
There is nothing to be lost or confused about - he is your ex, you have a new guy.....I dont get what there is to think about!
Your ex is using you - whenever he gets dumped he runs back to you because he knows he can walk all over you and get his way each time. He doesnt love you or care for you, he simply knows he can get his way and will keep on abusing that fact until you put a stop to it.
You dont need a parasite like this in your life, if you carry on this way he will keep doing it and you will never be free of him. Simply delete his phone number, remove him from your Facebook etc...get your cellphone provider to block his number from contacting you too. Then with no contact he cant keep bothering you anymore!
You cant stay friends with this guy, he will just keep on using you. So cut him out of your life and move on once and for all. Focus on the new guy or finding a man that actually treats you with respect and cares about you, rather than someone who treats you like a doormat and walks all over you.
I hope this helps and good luck!
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