A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:I've been talking to this guy for like 2 month now and the more we've been talking I've really started to like him. However after my previous relationshipi get jealous really easily which I really hate about myself! The other day we were texting and I asked what he was upto, he replied 'talking to you and (for example) jess' this made me really jealous and I don't know why? I'm not atall the type of girl who doesn't allow a boy to speak to girls, that's ridiculous! I've been thinking and I have massive confidence issues, I always compare myself to others and was wondering if this was it? I always think there's prettier girls he could be talking to.Why am I so jealous over it?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Aunty Audrey  +, writes (31 October 2012):
 Over time you will come to realise that jealousy crushes relationships. Both guys and girls will run when they find a partner has jealousy issues.
Some people mistake jealousy for love. Jealously is not love it is envy and it's horrible.
If you were secure and confident about who you are and what you have to offer then jealousy would not be able to get any traction in your life.
A jealous partner is tiring to deal with.
There will always be people who are better looking, taller, more petite, prettier, richer, smarter, more gifted, more talented than you.
But all that does not matter if you can establish what your strengths are. And value those strengths. Because you are loved for who you are and how you present to the world.
The green eyed slimeball of jealousy has a dirty repugnant stench about it. Try to stop envy enveloping you and destroying all your relationships in the future.
Be satisfied and secure with what are your unique gifts and what makes you special to others.
And if a guy you are crushing on cannot see the real you and the unique aspects that are part of you then he doesn't deserve your time in any case.
You have been talking to him for two months. You have a crush on him. He is not committed to anyone, yet. He is fancy free to flirt and enjoy life. That is what he is doing.
You need to curb your jealous feelings.
Because if and when he is ready to date one special girl he will not look at one who has been crushing on him and not accepting that he's enjoying the chase right now and he is not yet ready to focus on just one girl.
It's the age group. When he is a little older he will choose the girl who makes him laugh, who is a nice friend and companion. Who is nice to others. Who does not do tantrums. It most certainly will not be the girl who cannot contain her jealousy.
Try to focus instead on your most charming qualities and what makes you special. And then on what else can you do to imrove yourself while he is still fliring with many girls?
Sooner or later you will see him around your area. When you see him give him a nice smile and move on. This is far more intriguing for a guy then a girl who wants to monopolize his time, spend every moment with him and is the jealous type.
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