A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:I constantly worry about my bf breaking up with me. Im 19 years old and havent yet had a 'successful' relationship. I know im young but I feel like there must be something wrong with me because my first bf was emotionally, physically and sexually abusive to me (i broke up with him though). And my 2nd was emotionally and sexually abusive, and slightly physically too. But he broke up with me and that on top of al the abuse has shattered any self confidence i had. I dont feel like im worth anything. I feel that my bf is wayyy better then me. He is so confident and charming and everyone loves him. He was really popular in school. I dont feel like i have anything going for me apart from my looks. And i dont say that in am up myself way, because im not, i am incredibly insecure. I feel that guys only see me for my looks and thats it. they dont see me as a human being with feelings. or any other good qualities.I dont feel that i have any qualities really that would matter to my bf because me being smart, conservative and quiet never mattered to any of my ex bfs. im not sure if any of that made sense, i dont really even understand what is going on myself. im not even sure what my question is, just that i want help dealing with all these feelings. i feel like its torture living every day, not knowing if my bf is going to break up with me. my ex bf started ignoring me a week before he broke up with me and then he sent a text saying it was over. so everytime my new bf seems a bit distant i get so scared and think hes going to break up with me.
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female
reader, chloe71z  +, writes (19 August 2008):
 First you need to tell him your concernes, never hide anything all it does it make things worse he will love you more for being honest. Second It sounds like you need some counsling to deal with the way the other men treated you.
Also mabie some workshops on how to build you selfesteam up. Let your man know that your having these issues that you have to deal with and your going to a counsler for it. Mabie he can help you and talk to you about these things a little. Does he know how those men treated you in the past? If not when you do tell him, make shure that he knows you are NOT comparing him to the others, That would be BAD.
Just Talk to him. I know some men think thst getting sappy in a relationship is all girly but if he Loves you he will understand.
Good Luck and God Bless
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