A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: i really need some help. im in my last year of high school and its been hell. last year my previous best friend went out with my ex behind my back (among other things), and now it seems like everyone is still in love with her. all my friends tell me what a bitch she is for what shes done, and the next minute they turn around and say something mean about me to her instead. i know this is all very immature, and to be frank im just tired of it. the thing is that now, ive tried not to associate myself with people who will cause me these types of problems, and funnily enough my ex has become one of my closest friends right now after all this time. i honestly believe that he has changed from his manipulative ways, while my previous friend, hasnt. also, some of the friends who i thought i could trust have become the worst friends i have had. i am nice to everyone right now because i dont see the point in pointless bitching or angry confrontations, but the fact that now i have so few friends i can really talk to and trust is really upsetting me. i dont know what i should do...
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female
reader, ellababesx +, writes (2 February 2009):
Any person reading your question could tell that you were in high school.
High school is a hard time for relationships with your friends.
I know it's diffucult to have trusting friends and to find people who you know that you can rely on but most girls go through this in thier years of high school.
Right now, I probably have only 2 friends I can properly trust that I know who wont do some of the things your friends have done to you.
There isn't much you really can do, hun, other than trying out other social circles and see if any improvment is made with a new group of friends.
Stick with your ex right now if you believe that he has changed and hopefully if you hang in there, summer will soon be coming you're way, just keep fighting.
Good luck!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 February 2009): You've got the Right attitude. It really is pointless to stoop to their low level and play in their games. Save The Drama for Your Mama :) I love that one :)
Like the other poster said, I have 2 friends (plus 1 sister) I can Totally trust with my feelings. So it's NOT UNCOMMON to have just a few people you can be free to give your trust to. (and that's all I really need!) The rest you can be friendly with, but guarded in what you tell them. WHen I learned that lesson in life, I felt so much better.
Just remember we all make mistakes, and if that friend is Really sorry, it's worth giving them a 2nd chance. We all mature at different paces.
I believe you can stick it out the rest of the year, life out of high school is real living and not near the pressure. Especially if you advance your talents at a college or trade school. (your around people trying to better themselves)
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 February 2009): I know how you feel and look; basicaly you meet many people in your life and you call them friends, but only a certain few are true friends, if you think your ex is one of them, thats brilliant, because they are hard to find. Right now I think I have 2 true friends. Sure I have loads of friend friends but I wouldnt trust most of them. My 'best friend' didnt run off with my ex, but whilst going through an awful time in my life, she sided with the one that was making my life hell, and took her twisted views on things as truth. Now everything has settled down, but she wasnt there when I needed her, and so I dont think we can be friends again.As for you... well I dont know your situation fully, but is there a sort of popular cliche at your school? Have you watched Mean Girls? When it says 'She knew it was better to be in the popular group hating life, that not be in at all'. Thats sort of how I feel. Life is tough at the top, eh? Your right, they are just immature little girls who love to make a scene. If you cannot leave them, for whatever reason, I think you will just have to wait it out, its your last year after all. Stick with the few true friends you have, its what Ive done and everything seems so much better, trust me. Be nice to the others, there is no point in getting bitchy, thats what they want. Just dont give them any amunition against you, and remember! As soon as they leave high school and get into the real world, people arnt going to stand for their bitchy ways, and they will get their payback. Dont let it get to you, I expect their jealous, its the root of most problems with girls :/Good luck!! xx
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A
male
reader, lovelynightmare +, writes (2 February 2009):
Highschool was a hard time for me as well, I had an ex-girlfriend who was very popular and turned everyone against me.Stick with your ex if you believe he has changed, and try other social circles to see if you can make new friends. I know it's hard to have few friends, but one good one can make all the difference (i eventually asked out the one person who stuck by my side). And being February now, you should see summer soon enough. Just hang in there and keep fighting.
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