A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hi,well bassicaly this is quite funny!but i swear im in love with someone ive never even spooken to!,its getting so bad i cant stop thinking about this boy 3and the thing is i dont know if he likes me too but someway i think he does kinda, as he always smiles at me and he works in a shop sometimes he cant even serve people without looking and smileing, i just wish i could talk to him, but im kinda shy so i dont know what to do to let him know im welll imto him, ive actually never felt like this before its horriblee, everyday i see him and i fall for him more and more, please can some of yous help me talk to him and let him know im really in love with this boy ( i dont wanna be to forward)thankss alotxKirsty 17 Scotland
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female
reader, Themusicluva04 +, writes (25 January 2010):
Lets set the crush aside. You just want to approach this guy for friendship right now. Separate the crush, from the actual interest in him. You want to talk to him and get to know him better. That should be your primary goal here.So, lets think about this, how would you approach someone you want to be friends with? What if it was a girl? How would you approach another girl? Girls really aren't that different from boys. You're over-thinking this and you're dehumanizing him. You've objectified him, and you're making him into this strange new things, that you couldn't possibly understand. The fact is, you know how to talk to new people and make friends, so just keep it simple.Lets say he's looking at something. Walk-up along-side him and start commenting on what he's looking at. Have him join the conversation and let him start commenting on it. Then turn to him, smile and say, "Oh, hi, I'm ____, you're ____'s friend. Yeah, I've seen you around school." Then start talking about that thing you're both looking at again. Keep the conversation going. If you want to, you can flow into another subject. Just let the topics flow naturally. Avoid all the introduction stuff at first. You kinda touched on it, and you can come back to it later.Once you've peaked his interest and engaged him in conversation, then you can start asking him questions about himself, or you can make observations and either comment on those observations or ask questions. "I see you are wearing ____. Are you into ____?" If he sayd yes, then ask more questions about that thing. Get him talking abut things he likes. From there, learn about his past and what he's interested in. Then compare your past to his and share some of your interests."Oh, you're not from around here originally? Yeah, we moved here when I was 8, I'm from ____ originally." "Oh, you like ____ and ____, yeah I'm into ____ and ____, and we have _____ in common, so that's cool."Don't overstay your welcome. Let him know you gotta run, but when you see him around school, say hi and smile and talk to him. Ask him how his day is going. Talk to him about your day. Become this cool girl who he can talk to about anything.He may eventually ask you out, but if he doesn't, you can always ask him out. "I'm going to ____ movie/play/concert/party, and I'd really love for you to join me. I know we'd have a great time there together." You didn't pose a question. You just made a statement. By avoiding a question, you avoided loosing any power. You kept the power balanced. You also kept him from having to make a decision. All he has to do is agree with your statement. "Yeah, that does sound like fun." The date is made, and all he had to do was agree with you. It's just that simple. If he says no, he's not rejecting you, he's just rejecting your suggestion. He might have other plans. He might even say, "Oh, I can't make it that night, but you're right, we should go out. How is Saturday night for you?" It might lead him to ask you out. If he doesn't ask you out, then it at least leaves the door open for you to ask again. I would pose the statement twice, and as a last resort, ask him out the third time. By actually saying, "I really do like you, and I think we have a lot of fun together, would you like to go out?," you are making yourself vulnerable to rejection, but you're also being obvious about your intentions. There is no room for misinterpretation and he may respect your honesty and directness. Guys are asked out far less than girls are. Therefore, guys are much more likely to say yes. Most guys will say yes, assuming they're single.If you really like him, then befriend him. The fact is, you don't know him well enough to date him now. Get to know him. Make sure this is a guy you'd actually want to date. Dating a stranger is kinda odd when you think about it. We're told not to talk to strangers, so why would you want to date one? A first date is an awkward place to get to know someone, so get to know him before the first date. The most successful romantic relationships have a strong friendship at their core. It just makes more sense to begin that friendship before you go out, rather than try to create it afterwards.Source(s):Again, he's become this unobtainable object. He's litterally the man of your dreams. You gotta burst that bubble and get real. Women don't like it when a guy treats them like an object and you shouldn't treat guys like that either. He's just a person and you know how to talk to people. Don't over-think this. Just go right up to him and start a conversation. You can do this. The more you do this, the more experience you'll have and the easier it will get. It's always toughest the first time. You'll be alright. If he's mean, then you're better off without him. I doubt he'll be mean though. You've really got nothing to loose. If he acts nice, then that's great. If he doesn't, then no big loss, because you deserve better. Either way, you'll be alright.Best of luck in life and love. :-)
A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 January 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionits funny how people tell me im not in love haa, how the fuck dae they noo haha
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reader, anonymous, writes (22 May 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThankss alot thats really good advice:)xx
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female
reader, k_c100 +, writes (22 May 2009):
 This is quite sweet, you are not in love this is just a crush! And if you think this is what love is, well your in for a big shock when you do actually fall in love with someone for real!
What you are feeling is a strong attraction to him, combined with excitement and wanting to get to know him better. Because you have never spoke to him and have no idea if he likes you, then this builds your feelings even more because of the anticpation. You will be building little fantasies in your head I imagine of what he might say to you, how your first kiss will be etc.
The worst thing you could do is tell this guy you are in love with him, you will scare him off and he will think you are completely crazy. Love is just not possible unless you know a person inside and out, you have to be totally intimate with them and feel like you cannot live your life without that person in it. You only get this when you spend lots of time with that person alone, rather than just smiling at someone across a room! So if you told him you are in love with him he would think you are mad and he would run a mile!
If you start talking to this guy then this will show him you are interested - if you make the effort to get to know him this is a big sign to him that you like him. If you know his name then why not add him on facebook (you need to have spoke to him before this though otherwise he will think you are a bit crazy!). Why not go into the shop he works in at a quiet time when there wont be many other customers, and just get chatting to him that way. I dont know what kind of shop it is but maybe ask him for advice on something they sell, or ask him to recommend something that they sell. That will be the easiest way to start a converstation with him, and make sure at some point in the conversation you introduce yourself so he will know your name. Try not to chat about what you are buying for too long - maybe ask him a few questions about him like "how long have you worked here", "do you enjoy working here" etc. Asking questions about him shows that you are interested in him, and hopefully if he is interested in you then he will ask questions about you!
Just be brave, whats the worst that could happen? the only bad thing is that you could talk to him and for him to not seem very interested, so then you just leave. At least that way you will know how he feels and then you can get over your crush! And you never know, he might just like you too and ask for your phone number! But you will never know unless you try, so just pluck up the courage one day (when you are in a nice outfit and your hair's looking good!) and just talk to him. Its only talking after all!
I hope this helps!
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female
reader, Olivia(Y). +, writes (21 May 2009):
 Your not in love, You have a very big crush on someone.
Love is where you love their personality and would do anything for them.
Talk to this guy! Theres no harm in getting to know him. Go over to him and say hi and give him a compliment and go from there, You have nothing to lose :P
Good luck
Livia
xoxox
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 May 2009): I wouldn't say it was love...but...
If you like him, then go and buy something from the shop (that you actually like)and make small talk. If he responds well then make yourself a regular customer so he'll actually remember you and each time you can talk to him a little bit more. Try to befriend him before you take your intentions further.
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