A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Ok i've been dating this guy for 11 months now. He's 18 i'm 15. He's about to graduate and boy is that driving me crazy. But he cheated on me awhile back and i'm doing better with trusting him, but now he's all worried that i'm cheating on him?? I don't get it. Ive never given him a reason. And now he's all crazy and distant, he's acting really mean lately, and i have this crazy gut feeling he's cheating again but i can't find proof. I'm really scared. and madly in love with him. Please help. What should i do??
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 March 2010): I agree with the other posters. If a guy cheats, it actualy has nothing to do with his partner, its who he is. In all fairness one day he will grow up and stop this behaviour, but for now, this is who he is. The fact that he cheated and you know, and he knows that you know, means to him, that basicaly you give him permission to treat you this way. That you will accept it. Yeah, he might get some hell from you for doing it, but you'll still stick around. As for him accusing you of cheating, its because he is either insecure, abusive or he is the one cheating again and he is feeling guilty. No matter which one I think you are still very young and have many more men to come along in your life. I know couples can get past one of them cheating, but usualy they have something invested in the relationship, ie: kids, home, business. You dont have this. I think the only reason that you would stay is because you think he will change .. he wont ... or you dont think youre worth being with someone who loves only you ... and sweetie ... you are. Everyone is worth getting from there partner what they give. And trust is such a big issue in any relationship, without it, there isnt much left. As much as it hurts now, he isnt worth it, but you are ... move on ... give someone else the opportunity to show you what a healthy giving relationship is supposed to be about.
A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (6 March 2010):
 Love must be blind.
You better opened your eyes wide and see what he is or you will regret it big time.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (6 March 2010):
Dump him. If he's accusing you, chances are he's doing it again and trying to make you sound bad to take away the guilt. You can be as madly in love with him as you like, but it will all be wasted. Never allow yourself to be treated this way.
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A
male
reader, hypno1dr +, writes (6 March 2010):
A tiger cant change his stripes. If he cheated once, chances are he is cheating again, especially if you are getting a gut feeling about it. Here is a simple way to answer it for yourself: If you madly and deeply love him and he cheats with another woman who happens to have s.t.d.'s like aids or herpes, do you really want him back so he can give you what she has? Sometimes a mate that cheats and the other takes them back, the cheater will sometimes accuse the mate that hasn't done anything, to throw them off, so they can get away with cheating again. Does that make since? He may be accusing you of cheating just to throw you off with his infidelity to you.
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