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female
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anonymous
writes: Hello guys. I wanted to ask advice on whether I should be worried about some texts I found on my boyfriends phone. I know I shouldnt have looked, but it was sitting there and I just oculdnt resist. It was more nosiness than anything to be honest, I didnt think I had anything to worry about. I will give you exact transcriptions, and if you can tell me if I am being way OTT or rightfully concerned I would be SO GRATEFUL!!!!The first text sounded most odd. She had texted him - obviously in response to something but Sent Texts arent stored on my boyfriend's phone - saying "GET UP right now or I will come over there and make you get up!!"Then, later on one from her saying "Are you stalking me?" Then another saying " Oh sorry, I just saw you in town and thought you had seen me too" she then says "Yeah I was shopping for clothes to wear for my birthday party, I have to be the belle of the ball " and then one more saying "I know, shame for you isnt it!! Dont worry, I will send you a slice of cake!!"Its a lot of guesswork as I can tview what he sent to her. But do you think it soudns really flirty? I recognise the name and i THINK its a girl he was seeing for a while. We have been together two years and I know he keeps in touch with some of his ex flings.He nearly caught me looking at his phone. He noticed the light was on and it was unlocked when he came back in the room, and asked with a laugh if i had been looking at his texts. I denied it, and he laughed again and said I clearly had. I guess this means he doesnt think he has anything to hide.But I got a sinking feeling when I saw them as I think they are really flirty. I hate to think of him being like that, and wonder if these texts are the tip of the iceberg. Opinions please?? Am i being super sensitive or rightfully concerned??
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flirt, his ex, stalking, text Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2007):
.. heey everyone, feels awkward talking on here. But maybe you can help!? Just yesterday my boyfriend had started to act different .. it all started on how we were arguing on how he hangs at girls houses & he said I was being " a hipicrit " because I hang with guys as well, but not at their houses! But ever since then he's been acting not himself at all! It's driving me CRAZY and nervous! I found out he was at a girls house on my own, he didnt denie it but still, What should i do?
A
female
reader, snowbird  +, writes (10 October 2006):
 "Just doin' me job, mam", glad to help! (lol)..take care, - and thanks!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 October 2006): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks guys, actually really REALLY helped to get your opinions and that you dont think i need to panic!!
Snowbird in particular, you always come up with the best advice. Have helped me out a lot before - thanks, very much.
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A
male
reader, ogga +, writes (9 October 2006):
its nothing, he probably said in order of reply
"yeah im up, now piss off"
"what the hell are you on about?"
"oh, no i never saw you, what were you doingup therE?"
"yea cool, shame i cant make it to your party im at work" (probably thinking yeah theres another day i can make an excuse to getrid of her,
anyway what im trying to say is its nothing she probably just flirty, and it doesnt sound from her replies that she had much to reply too anyway so dont get frustrated over it
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A
female
reader, snowbird +, writes (9 October 2006):
Why don't you just say that you are curious about his communications with his exe's?
He may bring up the subject of that time when he noticed you had looked at his phone, and he does seem relaxed about it, so I am only guessing here, but he may even show you and explain.
The messages don't seem to be anything to worry about, as she was obviously going to a function to which he was not invited, he may have joked about gate-crashing what appeared to be a good party (as anyone would with a platoic friend)!
If he is at all uppity about you looking at his phone, just apologise and remind him that you are only human after all, and curious! If he can laugh it off, you can approach it in the same way, and this is how strong relationships are forged, with openness and good communication.
Discuss it with him, only he can really allay your fears. Good luck, I would be interested to know how you go on! :o)
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A
male
reader, Abacadaba  +, writes (9 October 2006):
 To be honest, it sounds more like she is stalking him XD with the wake up text, by the sounds of it nothing is going on, way i see it...
her: "Are you stalking me?" him: no why would you say that? her: "Oh sorry, I just saw you in town and thought you had seen me too" him: oh yea i saw you go into (shop name) Her: "Yeah I was shopping for clothes to wear for my birthday party, I have to be the belle of the ball" him: ooo cool, ive got work this weekend :( "I know, shame for you isnt it!! Dont worry, I will send you a slice of cake!!"
something like that haha, well, yea dont worry :)
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A
female
reader, CherryVanilli  +, writes (9 October 2006):
 Everything could have a double meaning, so I guess u'll never know until u ask him!! like say u noticed he's got many texts from this gurl, but dont say that u went readin all of them, or u can simply open his mobile infront of him & say this gurl sends u a lot, is there anything goin on I should worry about?!
I guess from his answer u'll be able to sense things, & I believe that it's ur right to be concerned! & when a boy feels that his gurl is a little concerned about him or jealous he'd know how much she loves him, but of course not too jealous ro too concerned! dont turn into a psycho reading all of his msgs & goin thru his phone, cos then there'd b no trust between u!! & I personally think that these msgs were normal, but then again u'll never know till u ask him...
Good luck :)
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