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female
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anonymous
writes: I am going through a hard time in my life at the moment and I really need some advice - really on how to deal with everything. I am having several health problems, nothing life threatening - as far as i know anyway but i'm having to see doctors regularly for one thing and another; gyno's regarding pain and stuff, and docs for what they believe is IBS (being made worse by stress), i've moved home to a gorgeous new place but its stressful as i'm kinda more 'change sick' than home sick, my hormones are always all over the place, i havent been eating properly, tho i am trying to get this under control. It all seems to begetting on top of me. My doc did mention anti depressants but hes obviously reluctant to prescribe these yet and i really dnt want to go down that road. I just wondered if anyone anywhere has any advice how i can calm myself down and stop worrying myself sick about everything. I quit smoking 8 mnths ago and i dnt want to start again - it seems a really easy way out and idnt want to give in as that will only add to my problems. I feel tired all the time and lie awake sometimes worrying about everything. any tips would be so helpful to me, i wil try anything! thanks Reply to this Question
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female
reader, LISAG +, writes (21 November 2006):
 It's human nature to not like change with regard to many situations. But time will ease your "change sickness". Also very well done for giving up smoking and being determined to stick to it, I'm a smoker and gave up for 6 mths earlier this year but started again, now I seem to be smoking more than ever! Also if your dr is reluctant to give you anti-deps then maybe he just thinks you're just suffering a phase of the blues instead. Herbal sleeping pills would be a good idea to make sure you are getting the essential sleep that you need, have you tried these ? You don't say what you are worrying about mainly at night when you try to sleep ? Insomnia effects so many people and this lack of sleep will be contributing to your well being, it is often a busy mind/worrying mind which keeps people awake, I think this as a couple of my friends who suffer have mentioned this fact. As the above advice suggests from rnb, try to do things to take your mind off of your worries, it's easy to say "don't worry" but it is true that most of what we worry about just dosen't come true ! I'm a bit of a worrier myself, but I just have a little worry about it and then force myself to get on with things, as you have no control over most of your worries anyway ! So it's wasted time spent worrying ! You could be thinking about how to make your life great instead. Read, listen to music, take up a new hobby, meet new people, do whatever you love doing and try to always better yourself and try harder, don't let things beat you down. One thought that always always makes me feel better if feeling a bit depressed is that there is always someone much much worst off than you! People with nothing in this world and in the worst situations you could imagine get on with it and cope don't they? I hope things start to improve for you soon x
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (21 November 2006): Lomotil is a drug that can help IBS, so speak to your doctor about it (check on line too). Also, for your diet you might try eating (even if it is boring) the same food each day (I mean a food that you can tolerate well). My wife has to do this, but it has really helped her (also she is on anti-depressants) far beyond what any combination of drugs could do. Plus, a daily exercise session (your own choice...for example, dancing for a period of time is perfect...or else a grunt & groan exercise program, or running...it's your choice) is something you should make a habit. Naturally, if you have the close support, committment, and understanding of a loved one this is part of the solution too. One more thing...you might find that working with others in need may help you as well.
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 November 2006): Hi, you mention that you have numerous health problems, one is irritable bowel syndrome, you have moved recently, and you are tired all of the time and you feel stressed out.
First off, you sound like you have the symptoms of depression, and all the major changes in your life are bringing it out full force in you....taking antidepressants would help you with your anxiety problem and your irritable bowel which is brought on largely by your anxiety....if you want to stop chasing your tail, I suggest you give the meds a try and go down that road to mental health, they are life changing, but not to worry they won't give you a different personality, just let the real you shine through for a change without all that edginess and snappishness that comes along with depression.
You may find that after taking the meds awhile that you get very angry and resentful at certain things in people, this is normal, it is all that anger that you are turning in on yourself that is making you depressed, and getting angry or not being able to do is part of your problem....this will be the sign that the depression is lifting and you will come out of it on the other side with a more balance mental state and life will start getting productive again. I think finding a therapist that you can talk to during this time would be very helpful, especially if you are lacking a social network for support since your new relocation...ask your doctor for a referral.
I also recommend you watch your diet and start excercising, and start taking steps to build a new life in your new town, get out, volunteer, go to church whatever, make some friends....it all takes time, but it won't happen lying in bed, so get out there!
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