A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I am in a 3yr relationship with my girlfriend and we both love each other an everything but recently ive been feeling kinda bored with her. I mean b4 i wanted to be with her and talk to her 24/7 an now its just i want to leave early an talk less . We talked about getting married and before i was okay with it but now im kinda scared thinking our relationship will stay boring or i will not have time to do stuff anymore or something like that. If anyone knows what i am going through please give me some advice on what to do. Thank You Reply to this Question Share |
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female
reader, HereAreMyTwoCents +, writes (10 October 2009):
When you are in it for the long haul with somebody it is normal to go through periods when you are more into the relationship and periods when you are less into it. But if you know in your heart that you want to be with her, and you love her, then you will take it all, boring parts and all, and you will work on ways of making your life together less boring. If you're not sure whether or not she is the one, then that is another matter. But if you know you want to be with her, you can definitely work on it. Get into new hobbies and interests together. Look for ways to spice up the bedroom activities. There is one thing in long-term relationships which is a rule of thumb, it is a rule which if you dare to ignore, it will ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS come back to bite you: You have to constantly work on the relationship. The same way as you have to always constantly maintain and keep up any other relationships, whether it be with your friends, your parents, your co-workers. Heck, even your car needs constant, regular and proper maintenance in order to work properly! And how much more your relationships with people!!! You always have to put in an effort to keep up the relationship. Always tell each other you love each other, so there is no room for doubt. Always do nice things for each other every day to let each other know you are appreciated and thought about. Put your time, energy and desire into her and then you will not be bored, you will be busy thinking of ways to make her happy, and to make both of you happy, TOGETHER. Talk to each other. By the time you are both 80 years old, if you talk about something different everyday you ought to have gone through just about every imaginable question under the sun. Joke together. Laugh and smile together. Forgive each other for the petty stuff. Know for sure the few things that you could never forgive if she did, and then make up your mind to forgive her for everything else. That's what it is all about in a long-haul relationship. And if you don't put your energy into it, your energy will go somewhere else into another part of your life. Guaranteed. That's how life works, it is full of a thousand pressures, tons of different people ideas events and activities pulling you in every direction, there are a thousand things in life all calling out for your interest and attention, so you have to know for sure what you want in life or else you will always feel bored, distracted and confused, not knowing which road to take. And if you know you want something, you have to STAY FOCUSED on it. If you know you want her, you have to STAY FOCUSED on her. What you focus on, is what you reap in life. I hope I have helped you to understand.
A
female
reader, Sweet-thing +, writes (10 October 2009):
I would definately re-think the whole marriage thing. It could be that your relationship has run its course. You're both pretty young, maybe too young to settle down at this point. Take a break from each other; seperate vacations, or just seperate for awhile. You may find that it re-kindles your feelings, and if not it may be time to move on. xoxox
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