A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi My problem is, that I've been seeing a woman for 8 months. Initially my feelings were very passionate. Up until recently I've noticed a difference in my feelings and I don't know why. Our love making is very powerful. We generally see eachother on the weekends, and spend alot of the time making love. I know that I have some feelings of tenderness, and I'm attracted to her, but some how, the passion from before is no longer the same, and I don't know if thats normal, or transient, or does it mean that I'm not "in-love".... Our sex life and emotions were of an intensity I've never previously know, and yet now, I feel that intensity slipping away, and I don't know what it means. According to Taoist sex, excessive ejaculation can lead to a loss of feelings. I've been attempting to control my ejaculations, and in most instances I'll be successful, however, we make love so much in one week-end, I lose quite a bit of sperm, and perhaps that is the reason for my emptiness. I don't know whats wrong with me. Does anyone have any ideas.I'd greatly appreciate it. Thanks people!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Blue_Angel0316  +, writes (27 October 2008):
 Intense sexual desire in form of Passion can give you intense feelings in the beginning. Like a kid with a new toy. However when the newness wears off the thrill often leaves as quickly as it came. Sharing these intense feelings can only last when you are really into this mind and body game. Your mention of lovemaking is what you percieve the sexual act to be. It is probably what you intend it to be, however Lovemaking is actually not making love at all when there is no love involved. Passion is felt when someone is attracted enough to reach out from the heartfelt emotion. The desire for sexual intimacy leading to more intense feeling and ultimately sexual intercourse.
After 8 months you are in what is called the After the honeymoon phase. Yes the newness has started wearing off. The sex act is beomming to mundane to ordinary. Try taking a break from the physical part of the relationship and try to rekindle that romantic part. Take time to enjoy doing things with your lady and romance her. Give yourself time to reflect upon the relationship and get some ideas on where it is headed. Perhaps you can bring back the old feelings and continue with better prospective to what you really want in this relationship. Best to you and your lady.
God bless,
Blue_Angel
^(**)^
A
female
reader, Miss Potter +, writes (27 October 2008):
 You say you've been seeing this woman for 8 months, what is your relationship like outside those weekender sex marathons? Is there love and care and desire to get to know each other better? If not, then it could be that your relationship is mainly about sex and if there isnt much else that attracts you to this woman then the intensity of the sex will wear off eventually anyway - people tend to get used to things if they do it over a long period of time and then it gets boring...
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 October 2008): HiDon'T worry just enjoy the moments and try not to analyze the future, if you really don't want to be with someone you wont be. What will be will be!
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