A
male
age
41-50,
*ohnnyG
writes:Hi! Im after falling in love with my ex's sister and dont know to talk to her about it or what, my ex and I have been broken up for 3 months now and she's seeing a friend of mine that iv known since school, I still talk to her and the fella, but her sis and me ALWAYS had a better laugh then me and my ex, she know's I like her, but she dont know that iv fallin in love with her, its so cruel, because I see her every day and wimp out when it comes to talking to her about it :-( Iv set my dead line for this thursday to tell her how I feel, or at least ask her ouT. aNYONE any IDEA'S??? Should I do it or what??? ANY advise or questions most welcome!!! :-) PLEASE!!!!! :-/
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male
reader, JohnnyG +, writes (22 November 2010):
JohnnyG is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks a mil for the advise 'hiro' Ill put it to good use! :-) Donna, we were going out over 6 years, were engaged for some time too, my intentions for her sis would be long term, and nothing malicious like getting back at my ex, thats why im falling in love with her, we always got on better and have such a laugh, her sis hasn't been seeing anyone in over a year, im getting the feeling she really likes me too, but she's hard to read! She's close to my ex but I dont think there's a "sister code" or any of that, and I actually dont think my ex would mind if we dated, I still talk to her and that, she's happy with the new guy too. Ill try some of Hiro's advise and see how the ball rolls :-) Thanks again guys for the replies :-)
A
male
reader, hiro06  +, writes (22 November 2010):
First, ask her out for just casual coffee or lunch so she doesnt think its an actually date. While on this casual meeting as friends flirt with her a lot to show that you are interest(gently touch arm, compliment, etc) DO NOT COME ON TOO STRONG REPEAT DO NOT COME ON TOO STRONG. At this point you are trying to get her to build an attracttion for her. Afterwards, end it on a good note dont kiss her, hold hands, nothing sexual.
Then a couple of days later call her or text her say that you were thinking about her and that you had a great time and that you guys should do it again. Ok, shere is where you have a few options you can at this point you can schedule another friendly encounter or tell her how you feel. I would personal ask her out to bowling, or working out, something that seems like friendly environment. Do Not Take Her Out to Anywhere that seems like date she will pick up on it and you will probable ruin your chances.
As on the second casual encounter I would increase the flirting(touching hair, made even try to get her to kiss you on the cheek playing a game or some type of wager). The next thing I would do personal would be to take her out somewhere romantic. Then, while on the just randomly tell her how you feel and how interesting she is, how beautiful, and how you enjoy her company corny shit like that and try to hold her hand while you are telling her this.
Sorry dude, but if you really want this girl I you wont be able to get it done by thursday. It kind of learning how to swim yo just cant jump into the deep in first you have to get your feet wet. She already knows you like her and most lightly she will shut you down because Im guessing you havent built much attraction in her. So, dont rush things take it easy and actually have fun. So, all this should take like a two weeks tops. And remember if yo cant shut down you had fun, but it wasnt meant to be. Her lost not yours.
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A
female
reader, Dona Suncha +, writes (22 November 2010):
Johnny G - believe me when I tell you, you are not the first and won't be the last to find yourself in this situation (although I was surprised with the age group). (I wonder who called dibs on you first - yes we women do that too.) You say you've been broken up for 3 months, I was trying to figure out how long you were together. And if you were together for a significant amount of time, and she's already dating another guy then maybe you two were meant to be only friends. The problem you have however, is whether or not the sisters obey "girl code" - which in this case is actually "sister code" - and that totally trumps "girl code." Because if they do - you are really barking up the wrong tree. Take a little while out and think about this - are you trying to go out with her sister to get back at her? Maybe for moving on so quickly with the new guy (which apparently doesn't bother you one bit.) And why the short suspense? Looks like you might actually cause Thanksgiving Drama at the house of the hot sisters. Is that really a good idea? Do you think you and the sister will actually commit to a long term relationship or do you already know if anything it will be short term, but you just want to get with two sisters? Well, whatever your rationale - and if you decide to go through with the pouring out of your feelings - make sure to look around the dinner table first, just in case there's a hot cousin, or aunt you may want to ask out next. Enjoy the friendships you create and don't look for love in your ex's family - cut your losses and expand your horizon. There are plenty of women out there looking for that guy that believes in love. -- Happy Thanksgiving!
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