A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend and I are planning on getting married very shortly. I'm very excited about it! And everytime I look at him, I can't help but think of how much I love him. Sometimes though, when I have a minute to sit down and put the wedding planning aside, I get increadibly nervous. Not so much about making the committment...more about how we're going to deal with problems that arise. Even issues we've dealt with in the past, like his obsession with porn that he's allegedly dealt with...what if all of those issues resurface and he just doesn't care anymore? What if its like, "Well, we're locked in and now we have to work through stuff no matter what...so I'll just do what I want and she can deal with it"? Is it normal to feel this way and have these doubts? Everytime I think of these things, I feel so guilty...like I don't want to hurt him, and its not that I don't want to be with him...I just don't know if this is a typical reaction. :S
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female
reader, rammsteinfan  +, writes (18 September 2007):
 I think that it's quite normal to feel anxious especially when you are about to get married! I even went through what you are going right now! Just pray about it, and everything will work out for the two of you!!
Good Luck and God Bless!!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 September 2007): I don't know how typical it is but I'm going through the exact same thing right now...good luck
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A
female
reader, kikicupid  +, writes (17 September 2007):
 Hi there, thank you for your question.It sounds completely normal to feel this way. You say you have have troubles in the past and you are worried they might come up again or that new ones will arise. I think the most important thing is to remember that you HAVE passed through those problems in a certain way and that you can deal with it again no matter what it is.You need to think of how things have evolved over time between you two and see whether it can get better and that you can get closer. It is absolutely normal to have doubts about theses things because marriage is indeed a huge step and can be taken too lightly. It is important perhaps to talk to your fiancee about your worries. See what he thinks and whether you can make a deal of not taking being married as being able to do what you want. You both have to agree this is a commitment to take seriously. You are marrying him knowing his faults and so is he, therefore there cannot be that many surprises!You love him and you will both me there for each other "til death do you part" and if you both truly and deeply believe that, then you will be fine.Good luck and congratulations on getting married!
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