A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I think I'm really in love with my best friend. I've know him for years but we're weren't close until recently. And I guess the more I know him, the more I'm in love. He's really sweet and caring. But one thing I'm afriad of is that he doesn't feel the same way.He is really cute and we would be chatting all the time. Sometimes I find that he is actually flirting with me. I thought maybe he does that to other girls too so I didn't really care.He said that he doesn't want a relationship currently. I tried asking him if he would date his bestfriend and he said he doesn't know. I asked him how he would feel if I have a boyfriend and he said he would be happy for me. I'm really really confused now. I really like him but I fear that it would ruined the relationship if he doesn't feel the same way. I guess he doesn't feel the same way. What should I do?
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female
reader, QuirkLady  +, writes (28 June 2009):
 I can see that you're really interested but he doesn't feel the same way about you. I think it would be a good idea for you to step back from him a bit. If you keep on being close with him your feelings will end up getting hurt. I'm not saying end the friendship, but perhaps talk to him less often, see other friends, go out and do some dating.
Good luck.
A
female
reader, marycontrary +, writes (27 June 2009):
Tell him you love him! Then go get a boyfriend who loves you back. Clearly he isn't interested. Be the stronger one and move on to someone more welcoming and deserving.
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A
female
reader, Original shiraz! +, writes (27 June 2009):
Its always a risk with a mate, you need to be 100% sure and right now your not so i wouldnt take any drastic action at all, like you say it could wreck everything. Dont take a risk on something if your not too sure, it could just be his flirtatious nature but i think hes got some idea that you like him and he hasnt acted so try and think it through. If hes your mate then surely talking to him would help, start it jokey as in god we have so much fun! or just a comment and read his reaction, its thin ice though so be careful. Dont push things, hes stated that hes not looking for a relationship take not of that. Feelings do change after a while especially when your so close to someone sometimes you simply read in to it too much and it back fires having awful consequences.Have the chat and ask yourself is it worth the risk?A best mate or a relationship thats based on that back question do you feel the same?Play this right and youll get your answer without wrecking what you have now.Best of luck
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 June 2009): Ummm, seeing as you've tested the waters and he's said he would be happy for you to have a boyfriend I would leave things as they are for now. He says he doesn't know about dating his best friend, but that he doesn't want a relationship right now. That says to me he wouldn't be completely off the idea of dating you, but because he's not in a relationshipy place right now he doesn't want to think about dating anyone.So I'd leave it, be a good friend and see what the future brings. Good luck xxx
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