A
female
age
22-25,
anonymous
writes:**Don't just assume because of my age that I'm not worth your time, because I could really use the help please** God I can't believe Im actually going through with this..,well, yes I know I'm young but everyone knows that people always date when they're young, but whatever...just don't judge. I REALLY DO NEED HELP. So, in seventh grade I really liked this guy named Cris,(I changed names, don't worry) and I didn't know it then but now I know that he liked me back. Then during the summer, we didn't see each other, so by the time we came back to eighth grade, I still wasn't sure if he liked me back or not.Then, towards the end of the year, rumors started spreading about how he either liked me or my best friend, but no one would tell us who it was. In the end, he ended up asking her out, and she said yes, despite knowing that I freaking liked him, and I'm sorry to admit it but it hurt. A lot. Ever since, me and my friend drifted apart almost immediately, but that's not the reason I'm writing.Two months after that happened, Cris's best friend David asked me out, so we've been dating ever since. It's been almost a year now, since I'm in ninth now. David's really nice, and he had been my boy bestie, the guy I always went to when I needed advice or just wanted to hang with. We were pretty close.But, Cris and his girlfriend broke up a while ago now, and cris and I have gotten to be good friends, and when we've needed a shoulder to cry on, were always there for each other. The thing is...I feel like I'm falling for Cris again, but I don't want to do it to David.Lately, i just feel like I really do like Cris, but I don't want it to seem like I will be there, and let Cris use me because he broke up with his girlfriend, so what do I do? Because if I do go with Cris, then that'll make me look bad because he's my old best friends ex. My heart stopped reacting as much as it did before when I was with David, and now I'm feeling this way for Cris again.Should I just try to get away from Cris? Or do I follow what my heart says to do, and tell him how I feel? Or do I just stick with the most logical reason my mind has come up with, and stay with David?Help. Please.
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female
reader, xgisellex +, writes (14 February 2015):
@Xearo ,thanks for that. I think those sayings really make sense with the topic, and I can't help but realize that they are in fact correct. It's like the One Direction song "Taken." (IF YOU HAVENT HEARD IT, YOU REALLY SHOULD. IT ISNT LIKE A GIRLYGIRL SONG FOR STUPID TEENS. ITS ACTUALLY PRETTY GOOD) Now that I have. Boyfriend, he all of a sudden comes back to me, but even though I might have the urges to "comfort" him, I have *David* now so I shouldn't fall for the trap. I don want to be in between their friendship, so *Cris* is going out of my mind...completely, this time.
A
female
reader, xgisellex +, writes (14 February 2015):
@Notsohappy thank you for the advice. I asked this question, and reading what you had to say about Cris made me realize that unfortunetely, yes, I feel like that might have been the reason why I was starting to think like that. It honestly did hurt me when my So-called "friend" did that to me, and I feel like yeah, I might have just wanted to prove I could take him because I thought that I should've had him in the first place. Thanks for saying that, and for helping be realize more about this situation.
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A
male
reader, Xearo  +, writes (20 January 2015):
To be straight, David is a good guy and has been there for you. It is easy to take these simple things for granted because a lot of people generally miss the things that matter the most.
I get that Cris is broken up and he needs comforting but this does not have to be your responsibility. When you are in a relationship, it always best to avoid getting yourself into these situations and you can see why. It's easy for you to fall for Cris again because he was someone that was not your first choice and now that he is broken, your instincts want to comfort him.
But let me tell you, the grass isn't always greener on the other side and you are falling for someone you only "think" you know. If your relationship with David is good, then there's isn't a need to end things. A wise man once asked, "Why ruin a good thing?". Also, I am not sure if you want to be in the middle of two best friends. Sometimes its not about the whims of your heart or the logic of your mind, but what your soul needs. Mind the respect of others even if you don't receive it because life is unforgiving and can be quite brutal. The last thing you want to be is friendless and constantly judged by others.
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A
female
reader, Midnight Shadow  +, writes (20 January 2015):
 You shouldn't "boy-hop", so I think you should break up with both, at least for now, and decide if you want to be with either of them after a few months of being single.
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