A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I'm 38 years old and married to an older man - he's 50. It's his second marriage and he's got 2 kids from his previous marriage. Over the past few months my attraction to my stepson has grown tremendously. We flirt a lot to the point it could be considered highly inappropriate. Anyway, I don't know if it's because the intimacy between my husband and I is diminishing, despite best efforts by both of us, or if it's just a phase I'm going through. Regardless, I am increasingly fantasizing about my stepson. Even though I know I want him, I will never cross that line and destroy the lives of the people around me. But it has got me thinking; maybe I should have an affair on the side and get it out of my system? I don't know what to do. My sexual frustration is increasing exponentially because of a gorgeous 19 year old boy walking around the house half naked. I just crave some physical contact and my husband can't give it to me. Help!
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female
reader, baddest_chikk  +, writes (28 February 2010):
 i understand you wanting to be with a younger man to satifie the needs ur man aint filling but honey ur step son is not the way to gothts actually sick the thought of u wanting him.. How long have u been married? and cheating is jus going to make a disturbing siuation ten times worst..tlk to ur man and tell him how u feel.. thts a sacrafised younger woman make when they marry much older guys is tht fact tht the sparkk will end..
A
female
reader, faded  +, writes (25 January 2010):
 I know this sounds crazy.
you have principles?
then respect the moralists and abstain from even thinking of him that way.
you`re a relativist?
then screw morals, get a divorce and preen yourself to get pretty younger boys!
why do you keep thinking of him? it`s clear that he is like a worm that eats you from the inside out...you said that with your own words-"My sexual frustration is increasing exponentially because of a gorgeous 19 year old boy ".
Does your mrriage makes you unhappy?
I dare to say it does.
If you really know where your marriage heads, then don`t be a coward and act on it. If the frustration increases, forget the moral restraints.
you are a motherfigure and this might look really wrong, but tabuus apart, it counts what you really desire.
does this attraction towards him sprout out of your need or maybe it`s more?
analyse for a while!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 January 2010): I have sympathy for your situation. Although not the same situation, my problem is with my 26 year old son. I tried to tell my husband that my son has been taking my panties and it is obvious my son isn't wearing them. I also tried to tell my husband that my son exposes himself to me. My husband, (step-father to my son) got excited over it! Sick bastard! So, we divorced. My now-ex brought all of this out in court!! But the judge simply ignored it and ordered my ex out of the house (which left me alone in the house with my son). My son lives with me because of an automobile accident we were in when he was twelve which left him with medical problems. I have spoken to my son about his problem, but his nurse has told me, in front of my son, that "that is normal" and "boys will be boys". Upset over her statement, I called her supervisor, a doctor, who said, "that's right! Its normal". I even explained to her that it is my 'soiled panties'. She replied she could refer us to a specialist but that I would get the same answer. I am a lawyer in Tennessee and I spoke with a fellow colleague who practices in juvenile court here. She said the same thing. In fact, she said "count your blessings". I was shocked! She is no longer a colleague I associate with.
So, let's see. I am now living alone with my son (who I do dearly love notwithstanding his sickness), divorced, absent a fellow friend and colleague, and embarrassed in front of the entire family law court for my ex's disclosures about my son! What's a mother to do?
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A
female
reader, Tigerlily +, writes (23 January 2010):
Stop flirting with your step-son and tell him to go put a shirt on. It IS highly inappropriate and sends completely the WRONG message to a 19 yr old boy. You may only be his step-mother but you are still a mother figure to him. Be a responsible role model. Don't indulge your fantasies about him either... if you need someone to fantasize about, find a celebrity and rent some movies.
Then, call a marriage counselor and get your MARRIAGE and your SEX LIFE back on track, pronto. There is absolutely no reason why your 50 year old husband can't give you some physical contact... but having him watch you flirt with his own son sure as hell isn't going to help matters.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (23 January 2010): It's wrong and will cause immense heartache. You need to send him far away or you need to go on a vacation to get a cool head back on your shoulders. It is the only way other than speaking to your husband about his inability to provide you with physical intimacy and addressing the issue so as to bridge the emotional divide.
If you read this site, having an affair will only dig you a bigger hole.
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A
male
reader, eddie  +, writes (23 January 2010):
 Cheating only makes things worse. Talk to your husband, I wouldn't mention his son either. It's an attraction. WE all have them. If it wasn't him it would be, and will be, someone else.
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A
female
reader, jc82 +, writes (23 January 2010):
 Put some distance between yourself and your stepson. Stop fantasizing about him. If you have a lot of sexual steam to let off, masturbate, don't cheat. Nineteen year old boys have absolutely no knowledge of the consequences of complicated sex, and they have ridiculously high sex drives. Its irresponsible and unfair of you to continue flirting with him. If he actually ended up sleeping with his father's wife, how do you think he would cope with that long-term? Its not fine.
You should calm down a bit, it sounds like you have gotten yourself all worked up. Sex is important, but not the most important thing. Try to have some perspective, and go to a toy shop and some porn sites for all that extra energy.
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A
male
reader, Sal84  +, writes (23 January 2010):
 Maybe you should really talk to him about your needs and maybe he might just give you permission to have an affair outside your family. But please spare your stepson.
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A
female
reader, pinktopaz +, writes (23 January 2010):
Jesus Christ, woman! Talk to your husband and have him take some Viagra or something! You honestly think anyone here is going to say, "Yeah, sounds like a great idea! Cheat on your husband with a younger man to fulfill your fantasies!" I know we all have our needs, but talk to your husband first and let him know it's a serious issue. And quit flirting with your stepson, I'm sorry, but it's just gross.
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