A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:having a little problem here. im working with this girl and we are extremely close. honestly I do have very strong feelings im not sure what this is I just know that I love being around her and just talking with her. but there's a problem she has a boyfriend and they've been dating since high school which is about three years now. he's a great guy. although she has come too me in the past cuz of her boyfriend. she has questioned me about what I would do in certain situations or how I would treat my significant other. I was honest with her each time. im ashamed of where im at already, stealing someone else's girl is the worst thing a man can do in my eyes. but at the same time I think I love this girl. im told by people around us that she is really into me and stuff like that. I really want to be with her but im not sure how to go about it. what do I do? im told by close friends that I should tell her. but it would put her in a bad position and I couldn't do that too her. I couldn't just cut all contact cuz of how close we are it would hurt her. she's helped me through some bad times and has been there for me numerous times, I do have a drinking problem but when we talk I don't need to drink. she tells me that when she's around me she feels safe and comfortable. im not sure what too do. please someone help what do I do?
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male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (16 February 2010):
I'm not sure whether you do love her or whether she seems like an escape from your problems with drink. You need to address that first. If she wants you, she'll come by herself. But sort the drinking problem out.
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