A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Need advice .... Been with this dude for 6 years and is has been HELL ... The reason I'm still in this situation is because he's abusive physically mentally and verbally and I have been scared for my life cause he threatens to kill himself and sometimes he says me to or he will say he will have his friends beat me up if I leave him and I didnt want to put my family in this perdicament.... I did the stupid mistake of moving to Florida with him and I sooooo want to go back home to NY where my children are .... It has been hell I have a dead end job and I have a college degree I have applied to jobs where I have been told I'm over qualified cause of my degree .. Got a job making 8 dollars an hour where managers and employees take advantage of you cause you are new and make you do all your work and theirs .... He has a cleaning job where all he works is 3-6 hours at night and acts like he worked a 10 hr shift and when he come home he don't do nothing he doesn't clean,Cook nothing I work overnight and I do a 9 hr shift 5 days a week and when I come home in the morning I got to clean the mess he left I gotta cook breakfast for him something he could do also but he so damn lazy and mind you he a grown man 28 years old .... I get paid bi weekly and he gets paid weekly I save more than him .. When he gets his check he wanna get tattoos and buy this and buy that and when his money is done he comes to me askin me for my money that I be trying to save ... We live in a hotel and he's not making no effort to even look for apartments and I been out here since march ... We drive by apartment complexes everyday and he always says next week we will come and it never gets done....he's always saying I'm selfish and don't know how to be a women because I don't come on to him when he wants sex he always wants me suck him ride him kiss him lick him and what he do to me NOTHING ..... It's always been like this since day one ... He promised that he will take care of me out here and guess what ?? I'm taking care of myself and him ... There more things but I'm sure it won't fit in here ... Bottom line I want to get out BADLY but I'm scared for my life and I'm scared that if I leave he will send people to my house in NY and have them hurt me because like he says I hurt him by leaving him .... Help I need advice
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (29 June 2013): Leave!
A
female
reader, deirdre  +, writes (29 June 2013):
get out of there as soon as.... you need to be reunited with your children and this loser is not worth your time
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A
female
reader, Agneta  +, writes (28 June 2013):
 Go now to the domestic violence center, some good person put the number for you further down here.
I guess you have not many friends you can trust in where you are now but in the center there will be professionals who know exactly what to do. Tell them clearly what has happened and for how long. They will not judge you. Show them what you wrote here. And stress the fact you fear for your life.
With whom are your kids staying? Make sure the current care taker gets notified once you are in the center to be extra careful in case he tries to get you through them. The center personel will know how to handle that too.
Go now!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 June 2013): I feel so sorry for you! That guy sounds like a loser! By the sounds of it you know it too and that you know you need to get out.
You said you have kids in NY so they must be taken care of so do you have to go back there? Can you not go and stay somewhere eals, while the dust settles. Or is there a women's refuge anywhere you know of? Getting out is the hardest part. If he dose hurt/kill himself then that is HIS decision not YOURS! Like you said is a grown 28 year old man. He is responsible for himself.
Do you know his friends? Do they seem like the type of people that would beat a women up on just the word?
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (28 June 2013):
Call the Florida Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-500-1119 and you will be connected to the domestic violence center nearest to you, or go to the Florida Coalition Against Domestic Violence website at
http://www.fcadv.org/centers
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