A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I have been friends with my best friend for 6 years and we are very close. Over the past few months we have been arguing more and more about stupid things. I feel that im not treated the way a best friend should be example...Im always the one who she blames for everything even when its her fault but she somehow manages to blame me and wont accept the blame and also she makes me feel like im the bottom of her priorities and we are growing apart. Iv given up seeing one of my other really close friend because she falls out with me over it and i hide the fact i see other friends just to keep the peace with her. Im fed up of things being this way and want her to realise how her moods are affecting this friendship. At the moment she is having family issues and i dont like to ask but she is now accusing me of not caring or being a friend for not wanting to ask about it when its none of my business.Im growing closer to ending this friendship but would like advice on what to do to try and sort it before it comes to that please.
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 June 2011): I used to have a best friend just like that. She always treated me like trash, everything was always my fault, and in the end I was always the one saying sorry whether it was my fault or not.
Everything about our friendship depended on the mood she was in. If she was in a good mood, things were great and we had a lot of fun. But if she had a stick up her ass that day then it would really be better for me to hide and stay out of her way. If I tried to interact with her in ANY way she would get mad at everything I did. I couldn't do right by her no matter what I did.
I would like to tell you now that the harder you try the more you'll get treated like trash and you shouldn't let that happen. I was so hurt by her so many times because of her moods that one day I just got sick of her and stopped calling and stopped trying to hang out with her.
When I did that she would act all nice to me again and want to hang out, but soon after it was back to her moods. It will never change. Everything in this relationship will be on her terms.
I still see my friend from time to time, we remain friends. But I will never be a close friend to her again, when that happens she begins treating me like trash.
I recommend you do that same. Take a few steps back and don't let her hurt you anymore.
A
female
reader, kylieekristina +, writes (3 June 2011):
It sounds to me like you can't win....and a true friend doesn't want to keep you just to themselves, true friends want you to be happy, and listen to what your wants and needs are as well as hear theirs. I think you two have been friends for a long time and it would be crazy not to at least tell her how you feel and see if anything changes
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