A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi I am married but have a harmless crush on one of my students father Recently . Previously I didn’t notice him but now I do and I feel like he is avoiding seeing me as I’m also new to the class.. however he doesn’t behave that way to other female Teacher .. just me wen I’m there he kind of avoids looking at me and stands far but when other female Teacher is there he Comes nearer to send off his child.. what is the reason he avoids looking at me ? Side note I’m younger and considerably prettier than the other female teacher ..
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reader, anonymous, writes (13 March 2020): He's picking-up on the vibe that you want to be noticed; because you might be making it blatantly obvious you want his attention. Your conceit is showing!
If he's a married-man, and aware you're flirting; he'll avoid you.
Do you presume to know his marital status, and whether he's taken?
You can trust me on this. If you have been breaking your neck to make yourself visible; those other teachers have already hipped that dad that you're married! He may even know your husband, or he has seen him!
If you boast yourself to be younger and prettier, don't you doubt for one minute they don't have you pegged for a big flirt and full of yourself! Women see through each other! They notice you eyeing the guy, and they have likely alerted him to avoid you! Gossip gets around!
You're a local teacher. Most parents know the teachers where their kids attend school; and something about your background. That includes if you're married, a drunk, creepy, or a flirt. It's a parent's job to know who is teaching their kid 6-7 hours per day, five days per week!
Behave yourself, you're being silly!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 March 2020): You went totally beyond 'just looking at this guy' already! You've written in asking why people might think that he doesn't look at you. You care WAY more than you're allowing yourself to believe and we can ALL see that you would like to take this further, otherwise why are you caring so much?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 March 2020): You're a teacher and smart enough to know something inside you isn't quite right. Or you wouldn't even be entertaining such a thought. You want us to tell you he likes you? It's all just a fantasy in your own head. I went for a married man and it literally destroyed everything good about me. If you love yourself, you would stop all thoughts towards this man.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (12 March 2020):
 I hope you are not an English teacher...
Unloyal? Seriously?
No, no one is perfect, but there is such a thing as being professional, appropriate, using common sense, and acting like an adult. You should try it. Any of them really.
You are a teacher so a DAILY role-model to the kids to teach. A support for parents, but if you can't BEHAVE with some decorum you probably won't have many parents asking for advice or support.
Having a crush happens to everyone, it's what you DO with that crush that can be perceived as totally inappropriate or not. And YOU being a married woman and he a married man, it kind already sounds like a stupid thing to play around with, even if it's just in your head.
Maybe ask your husband what HE thinks? Yes?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 March 2020): Why????You are creeping him out.Just stop it.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 March 2020): Hi I am the OP.. FYI my crush is not obvious becoz I hardly look at this man and I am always busy handling students so it’s not obvious at all.. so I’m thinking he is just intimidated by me ? Could this be? Also how does haves having a crush on someone invalidate my marriage vows? Please don’t tell me after marriage you don’t look at other man or women and feel like they are attractive to you and crush on them ? Don’t tell me you don’t crush on a celebrity ? So what this invalid your vows or makes you unloyal ? I don’t understand . I said harmless because I have never went beyond looking at this man at all ! Dont have to be rude and judge like you Guys are perfect !
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 March 2020): A 30 something year old teacher wrote that mess? Heaven help her students. And heaven help her husband. This is a married woman behaving this way? Lady if this crush was as harmless as you make it out to be you wouldn't be writing here asking for advice.
Focus on you students and your marriage not some guy.
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A
female
reader, mystiquek +, writes (11 March 2020):
 I second Code Warrior's thoughts. You should be concentrating on being a teacher not the student's father. You are MARRIED. Did you ever think that maybe the father is too?? Geez.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (11 March 2020):
My guess is he can sense your "crush" and he is avoiding YOU and the drama that could ensue.
I think you need to get a grip, lady
You are there to teach kids, not lust after the dads.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 March 2020): Maybe he can sense that you like him and avoids you because he's not interested.
Maybe he's also married, but respects his marriage vows. Unlike you.
Perhaps he has no idea that you like him and you just don't figure in his thoughts.
Who knows? Maybe you should concentrate your thoughts on your husband? Harmless crush? Really? You sound rather obsessed.
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