A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Before i meet my gf of 8 years i was really close to a female friend. Looking back (perhaps through rose tinted glasses) i can remember times when things got a little heated, such as the time she came out the shower with nothing on, knowing full well i was still in the hotel room. There were other instances of touching/hugging that come to mind and the night i came out to her and she said "I used to think i was a lesbian too" but in the state of mind i was in I cut her off before she could finish. Since then there has been another occasion when i think shes tried to tell me she might be a lesbian but i'm shy and i didnt ask the question that i think she wanted me to. She's not had a BF or shown any interest in having one for as long as i've known her (15 yrs). I suppose in a way i need a form of closure. I love my GF but i cant stop thinking about this friend and what may have been. Do i tell my friend how i feel?
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female
reader, Gwyneth  +, writes (2 March 2007):
 Ah, me. Yes. I understand how you feel. It's so hard to stop thinking about those instances in the past when friendship spills over into the arena of sensuality. As a fellow lesbian, I have had many such episodes myself. In fact, I recently had an affair with a woman who I started out with as a close friend. I was completely honest with her about my sexuality and she was honest with me about hers. She is primarily straight-identified, and I am a lesbian.Well, after being fun friends for a month or so, she started having problems with her boyfriend and we started kissing each other passionately within the space of an hour after she and her boyfriend broke up. How did it happen? I have no idea. But, it was very sexy and stands out as one of the best one-nighters of my life.However, when she worked things out with her boyfriend, she found it hard to continue being my "friend" anymore because she said the sex was so good with me that it made her question her sexuality and that was just too complicated for her.Anyway, you may deduce from these facts what you will. I will not advise you for or against certain actions here. But, I will simply say, consider what you would gain from acting on your feelings for her and what you would keep by not acting on them.Bon chance!
A
female
reader, nicola79 +, writes (1 March 2007):
 I think its just lust,its a question unansewed (WHAT IF).
You need to carry on in this lovely relationship you are in now, you are loved and you love her. This friend you talked about knows you are a lesbian and I think she was teasing you and thats not very nice,she knows you have a partner. You need to just consentrate on you and your gf and just be friends with this other woman.
If she was to do it again I would say if I was you is, "What are you doing,we are friends and you know I have a girlfriend"
She may want to try it out and its soooo important that you are not the one who she does it with flower,it will ruin your friendship and if it ever gets out then your gf will not ever trust you with other friends.
Ohh I do hope it works out for you my love, xxxxxxx
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